Legends Of Tomorrow Season 1, Episode 8: Night Of The Hawk

This week's Legends Of Tomorrow plays out less like a superhero show and more like a horror film, or an episode of The X-Files. 

At the end of the previous episode, it appeared that Captain Cold killed his partner Heat Wave in, er, cold blood, to end his threat to the team. Cold's teammates cast lots of accusatory glances toward him in this episode, but there's no mention as to whether he actually killed Heat Wave or not. Which pf course means he didn't. 

It was fun seeing the cast decked out in 1950's period clothing, instead of their usual duds. 

This episode gave us an interesting look at the 1950s, a period that's generally considered idyllic, but in reality had a dark undercurrent of racism, gender bias and homophobia. Unfortunately Night Of The Hawk brings up many questions on these topics, but doesn't bother itself with answering them. It would have been better if this episode had been a two parter (actually, given the cliffhanger ending, maybe it is).

Now that I think about it, just about every episode this season would have benefited from being spread over two parts. Each week the show tries to give every member of the large cast something to do, but all that does is result in rushed and unresoved subplots and storylines.

According the the credits, this episode was directed by Joe Dante! He directed the Gremlins films as well as Innerspace.

SPOILERS!

The Plot:
We open in the small town of Harmony Falls, Oregon, in 1958. Two local teens, Tommy Fuller and Betty Seaver, are out on a date. Tommy's challenged to a drag race by a couple of other teens, and accepts. As the cars race down a deserted road, Tommy's car blows a tire, and he and Betty run off the road and crash, right next to a glowing blue meteor. 

A shaken Tommy gets out of the car, and he and the other two teens stare at the space rock, wondering what it is and where it came from. Suddenly Vandal Savage appears, saying he was drawn to it, and the teens' presence is destiny. He stops just short of tilting his head back and laughing maniacally.

Meanwhile the Waverider lands in Harmony Falls and begins the search for Savage. According to Gideon, there've been several local disappearances and murders the past few months, and Rip Hunter suspects Savage is behind them. He splits up the team to investigate.

Atom and Hawkgirl pose as a married couple interested in buying the home of one of the victims. As an interracial couple in the 1950s, they face prejudice from the uptight real estate agent. 

Professor Stein somehow gets a job as a doctor at the local mental hospital, filling the vacancy of another victim. White Canary poses as his nurse. She meets Nurse Carlisle, and immediately senses she's secretly a lesbian, another no-no in the 1950s

Jackson hangs out with the local teens, hoping to find clues as to their disappearance, which seems like a bad idea, as he's apparently the only black person in town.

Hunter and Captain Cold pose as FBI agents and visit the local sheriff, asking to see his files on the murders.

Later on Stein, Canary and Jackson meet up at the local diner. Stein waxes nostalgic about the idyllic 1950s setting. The other two point out that it's fine as long as you're white, male and straight. Otherwise you're in for a rough time in the socially backward period. Jackson recognizes Betty from the newspaper article, and befriends her, hoping for information. After deflecting some unwanted attention from some local racist jocks, he asks Betty out on a date. Amazingly, despite the fact that she just lost her boyfriend, she accepts.

At the hospital, Canary befriends Nurse Carlisle and tells her she knows her big secret, and it's OK. Carlisle tells her about "Dr. Knox's" secret Hall H, a restricted ward filled with dangerous patients. Knox of course is really Vandal Savage, since apparently anyone can walk into this hospital and become a doctor.

That night a man is changing his tire, when he's killed by flying werehawks. Yep, that's what I said.

Meanwhile, Atom and Hawkgirl are pretending to move into their new home by unpacking boxes of... something. They meet their next door neighbors, who turn out to be Savage and his "wife" Gail. Savage immediately recognizes Hawkgirl, but she pretends not to know who he is. He doesn't suspect Atom, since Savage hasn't met him yet in 1958 (confusing!). Savage, aka Knox, invites them to a dinner party at his home.

Atom and Hawkgirl attend the dinner party, while Stein and Canary search the hospital for clues. Canary and Nurse Carlisle grow closer, as an alarm goes off in Hall H. Back at the party, Savage is flirting with Hawkgirl, while Atom searches the house. He finds a room protected by a locked and reinforced door. 

The hospital calls Savage, and he immediately excuses himself and rushes to his ward. He finds one of his werehawks, one of whom is Tommy Fuller, have killed an orderly. Savage scolds them.

Atom uses his suit to shrink and enter Savage's locked room. Inside he finds the magic McGuffin dagger, the only object that can kill Savage. He steals the dagger, shrinks and barely escapes the room before Savage enters. At the hospital, Nurse Carlisle kisses Canary, which confuses her, causing her to leave.

Jackson goes on his date with Betty, Suddenly they're confronted by the racist jocks from the diner. Jackson manages to fight them off, but just then the werehawks swoop out of the sky and fly off with the jock. Betty recognizes one of the werehawks as Tommy, and he slashes her neck before Jackson is able to drive away. Jackson is then pulled over by the local sheriff, who knocks him out, leaving Betty battered and bleeding in the car.

Hunter and Cold find the car, but no sign of Jackson. They take Betty back to the Waverider so Gideon can treat her injuries. Betty comes to long enough to tell them her boyfriend is now a werehawk. Hunter deduces that Savage found another Nth metal meteor, similar to the one that gave him and the Hawks their powers. He tells Stein to start working on a way to reverse the werehawk transformations, while the rest of the team works on a plan to kill Savage with the McGuffin dagger (yawn, this again?).

Jackson wakes up strapped to a table in Hall H. Savage, who doesn't recognize him yet (because time travel), injects him with the meteor juice and transforms him into a werehawk. Hawkgirl arrives and attacks Savage with the dagger. He's able to get the upper hand and holds the dagger to her neck. He unleashes his werehawks, including Jackson, into the hospital. 

Stein and Cold arrive at the hospital and are confronted by Hawk-Jackson. Cold has a chance to kill Jackson, but doesn't, instead subduing him by freezing an overhead pipe, which collapses and knocks him out. Canary saves Nurse Carlisle from a werehawk. Atom burst into Savage's lab and sees him threatening Hawkgirl. He blasts Savage out the window (of course).

Stein and Cold take Jackson back to the Waverider. Stein injects his gene therapy treatment (that he whipped up in about ten minutes) into Jackson, and amazingly it works, transforming him back to normal. He then uses the therapy on the other werehawks. Canary visits Nurse Carlisle and apologizes for freaking out, and wishes her luck in her newly awakened life. Jackson says goodbye to Betty, gives her a new car (?) and tells her and Tommy to get out of Harmony Falls.

Back on the Waverider, Chronos appears out of nowhere and enters the ship. Hunter orders Gideon to take off. Atom, Hawkgirl and Canary are walking back to the ship and see it take off without them, stranding them in 1958.

Thoughts: 
• At the beginning of the episode, the teens drag race while Rock Around The Clock on their car radio. My Anachronism Sense started tingling, so I checked to see when the song was released, and found it came out in 1954. It might have been a little dated by 1958, but it was entirely possible kids would still be listening to it.

• After the Waverider arrives in 1958, the Legends all suffer various vision problems. Hunter says, "Yes, as I mentioned before, the effect of time travel on the human body increases with the length of each jaunt." 

What the hell does that mean? Does he mean a time jump of fifty years will affect a person more than one of five? Or is he saying the effects of time travel are cumulative, and the more jumps they make, the more their bodies will be affected?

Either way, why doesn't the rest of the team seem more worried about this?

• Extreme Nitpicking Alert! When the Waverider lands in Harmony Falls, Gideon provides Hunter with various info on the town, including what appears to be CCTV footage of Main Street, as well as images of newspapers headlines.

How the hell is Gideon doing this? If they were in 2016 it would be no problem, as she could simply tap into our various information grids. But there were no CCTV cameras watching the streets in 1958, and no internet to scan for front page news. Newspapers of that era were likely stored on microfiche, which isn't connected to any sort of network. So how's Gideon remotely getting all this info?

See, I told you it was extreme nitpicking!

• Hunter has the various Legends split into teams to gather intel on Savage. For some reason Hunter has Atom and Hawkgirl pose as a married couple. An interracial married couple, in 1958. Naturally their "marriage" raises quite a few eyebrows, and draws unwanted attention to them.

Wouldn't it have made way more sense to pair Canary with Atom? Of course if they did that, then the writers couldn't have brought up the whole racism angle, Atom and Hawkgirl's romance couldn't have progressed, and Canary wouldn't have hooked up with Nurse Carlisle. 

• As Atom and Hawkgirl unpack in their new home, Vandal Savage and his wife Gail knock on the door and welcome them to the neighborhood. This entire sequence raises several tons of questions, none of which are ever answered.

First off, just what are Atom and Hawkgirl unpacking? Did Gideon replicate dozens of moving boxes full of clothing, lamps and dishes for the couple to unpack?

Did Atom and Hawkgirl know their new home was right across the street from Savage's? If not, then what an astronomical coincidence it was that they just happened to move in next to the immortal psychopath they're trying to find.

Savage, posing as Dr. Curtis Knox, has a wife named Gail. A wife? Jesus, just how long has Savage been in Harmony Falls? Given that he says he was drawn to the meteor at the beginning of the episode, I got the impression he's only been there a few weeks. That seems like an awfully short time for him to meet, woo and marry Gail.

Does Savage have some sort of hypnosis powers? Maybe Gail was a single woman and he hypnotized her into believing they'd been married for years?

Savage gives Atom and Hawkgirl a tuna casserole as a housewarming gift. Later we see Atom hungrily chowing down on the casserole. Is that a good idea? What if Savage poisoned it?

• Savage uses the alias Curtis Knox in this episode. If that name sounds familiar, it's because there was a Curtis Knox a few years ago on Smallville. Dean Cain was all set to play Vandal Savage on the show, but at the last minute DC Comics, for reasons unknown, asked the writers to change his name. They chose Curtis Knox.

• Do Savage's hair and beard look extra, extra black in this episode? Seriously, his hair approaches Billy Mays levels of utter blackness. Apparently he's a big fan of Just For Men.

• Apparently it was much easier for a doctor to get a job in a hospital back in 1958. 

Savage arrives in Harmony Falls and within what appears to be a couple of weeks at the most, becomes a doctor at the local mental hospital, in charge of his own restricted ward full of problem patients.

Then Stein joins the hospital staff after what appears to be a sixty second interview.

• Hunter and Cold dress up as Men In Black, I mean FBI agents to visit the local sheriff. 

Arthur Darvill (aka Rip Hunter) shows off his best American accent in the scene. In fact it took me a minute to realize he wasn't speaking in his usual Time Lord, er, British, accent.

When the two enter the sheriff's office, he's trying to tune his TV, which is playing The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms. The film came out in 1953, so it's entirely possible he could be watching it.

• Speaking of accents, Casper Crump, aka Vandal Savage, attempts an American accent in this episode as well, with cringe-worthy results. His accent is all over the place— when he remembers to use it, that is. At times he sounds like he's attempting a Southern accent (in Oregon), and other times it's completely unidentifiable. Then he seems to forget about it all together, going back to his usual Egyptian (or whatever it's supposed to be) mode of speaking.

• Hunter sends Jackson to gather info from the local high school students. I get that he was the only team member young enough for this mission, but due to his race he doesn't exactly blend in.

Sure enough, he's soon threatened by a couple of white, racist jocks. He tells one of them, "Why don't you do yourself a favor Biff, and keep walking?" That was obviously a Back To The Future reference.

• Betty doesn't seem very broken up by the loss of her boyfriend. Jackson flirts with her for literally thirty seconds and she practically throws herself on him, even going so far as to ask him out on a date!

• Canary gets to know Nurse Carlisle, who says she's never left Harmony Falls. Canary says, "That's your first mistake. This town sucks." Carlisle seems to understand what that means.

At first I thought, "Wait a minute, people didn't say 'sucks' back in the 1950s." But when I looked it up, I found that the term's been around a lot longer than that.

Most people think "sucks" is a recent term that's connected to oral sex. It's actually much older and more innocent. You can find instances of it all the way back to 1913, when children's books would use the phrase "sucks to you!" as an insult.

No one's quite sure where it came from, but some believe it's a variation of "Go suck an egg!" And that's one to grow on!

• I didn't really understand Savage's master plan here. He finds a meteor that's similar to the one that made him immortal and gave the Hawks their powers. So he starts injecting meteor juice into random townspeople, I guess just to see what happens. Then when they become werehawks, he decides to build an army of them and use 'em to take over the world?

• Professor Stein and Jefferson normally share a psychic link with one another. Once Jackson disappears, the others ask Stein if he can sense where he is. Of course he can't, because the psychic link always fails when it's convenient to the plot.

• Apparently animating CGI wings on the backs of all the werehawks was expensive, so there are a couple of scenes in which the monsters are inexplicably wingless.

• After the plot is resolved, Canary says goodbye to Nurse Carlisle, who says, "I get it. I should have known better than to fall for a ninja." Did people in the 1950s know about ninjas? I don't remember them becoming a thing in popular culture until sometime in the 1970s.

• Jackson shows up at Betty's house to say goodbye. He tells her he feels bad for trashing her dad's car, and bought her a new one that he souped up himself. A few things here.

First of all, calling the car "trashed" is a bit of an exaggeration. From what I could see it suffered a torn convertible top, and a smashed window. Hardly reasons to total the entire car.

Secondly, how did Jackson buy Betty a new car? We know Gideon can manufacture period-specific clothing— can she do the same with money as well? 

Lastly, how's Betty going to explain this to her folks? "Honest, Daddy! A mysterious black boy appeared and gave me a new car!"

• For a while now, there's been something about Jackson and his relationship with Professor Stein that seemed very familiar to me. This week I finally figured it out— Jackson and Stein are Troy and Pierce from Community!

Think about it— on Community, Troy Barnes was a talented high school football player who had his pick of colleges. He blew out his knee doing a keg stand during his graduation party, ending his chance for a college scholarship. He went to community college, where he became friends with a middle aged student named Pierce Hawthorne. He even lived in Pierce's house for a time.

Jefferson Jackson was a talented high school football player who had his pick of colleges. He injured his knee during the Central City particle accelerator explosion, ending his chance for a college scholarship. He was approached by STAR Labs and merged with a middle aged Professor named Martin Stein. When the two touch, they combine and form the superhero Firestorm.

• Sigh, Chronos shows up yet again to force another last minute time jump. Is he ever going to get a line? Or do anything other than show up and start shooting? At this point he's nothing more than a living scene transisiton.

• When Chronos attacks the ship, Jefferson wisely suggests he and Stein form Firestorm. Stein replies with a lame excuse that merging would set the ship on fire or something. I have a feeling the real reason they didn't merge was becasue this week's effects budget was used up on adding wings to the various werehawks.

• There's apparently a HUGE time jump at the end of the episode.

When Jackson is talking to Betty, everything is green and there are leaves on the trees.

Then as Atom, Hawkgirl and Canary are trudging back to the Waverider, they're bundled up in coats and there's snow on the ground (!).

Either several months passed between these two scenes, or the Waverider is parked on top of Mount Hood (elevation 11,000 feet)!

Legends Of Tomorrow Season 1, Episode 1: Pilot, Part 1

After months of seemingly interminable setup by both The Flash and Arrow, DC TV's Legends Of Tomorrow is finally here.

So how was it, after all that buid-up? Eh, overall it wasn't a bad debut. It was a little rough around the edges, but that's normal with pilots, as the cast and crew get their bearing and fall into a rhythm. The series, which teams up eight different second stringers from the TV-verse, wastes absolutely no time getting started. In fact the various characters had all been recruited before the title screen appeared! The episode had to hit the ground running though, with so many different characters to deal with. 

I can see right now that characterization is probably going to take a back seat on this show. There's just not going to be enough time to give every character their due in each episode. Maybe they'll have them split up into smaller teams now and then, so the show can focus on just a couple of heroes at a time.

It appears the show's main premise is for the characters to travel to a different time period each week to stop Vandal Savage. I hope they're not going to stick to that formula every week though, because that'll get old real quick. Same goes for Rip Hunter being relentlessly chased by Chronos— I hope that doesn't happen every week as well. I'm hopeful they'll mix things up once in a while.

To get you up to speed on the cast, the main characters are:

Rip Hunter

A Time Master from the year 2166. He's basically the Doctor from Doctor Who. He's the leader of the group.

Ray Palmer, aka The Atom

A billionaire industrialist who wears a high tech suit that allows him to fly, as well as shrink. Think Iron Man crossed with Ant-Man.

Professor Martin Stein and Jefferson Jackson, aka Firestorm

Stein is a middle aged nuclear physicist, and Jackson is a twenty year old auto mechanic. The two can merge to form Firestorm. When they merge, Jackson is in control of FIrestorm's body, while Stein manifests himself as an annoying voice in his head. Like Jiminy Cricket.

Carter Hall, aka Hawkman, and Kendra Saunders, aka Hawkgirl

The latest reincarnation of an ancient Egyptian prince and priestess. The two have been killed 206 times by Vandal Savage, who gains power from their deaths. Whenever they're reincarnated, they always manage to find one another and live out their new lives together.

Sara Lance, aka White Canary

Originally just the Canary, after dying and being resurrected she calls herself White Canary. She has higher than normal strength and is skilled in many forms of combat. She's the "Black Widow" of the group.

Leonard Snart, aka Captain Cold

A criminal who uses a gun that shoots freeze rays.

Mick Rory, aka Heat Wave

Captain Cold's accomplice, who's armed with flame-throwing heat gun.

The series definitely looks good, especially the vast Waverider set. And just like they do on The Flash and Arrow, The CW somehow manages to deliver movie quality special effects on a weekly TV series. Kudos to the effects team!

Lastly, this week's episode is titled Pilot Part 1. Obviously it was supposed to be a two hour premiere, so I wonder why they split it in half instead of airing the whole thing at once?

SPOILERS!

The Plot:

In the year 2166, the evil immortal Vandal Savage has conquered the world. Rip Hunter tries to convince his fellow TIme Masters to let him travel 150 years into the past to recruit a team of superheroes to stop Savage. When they refuse, Hunter steals a time ship anyway and goes through with his plan.

In 2016 he uses his futuristic technology to abduct the Atom, Firestorm, Hawkman, Hawkgirl, White Canary, Captain Cold and Heat Wave. He tells the group they have a chance to stop Savage before he can rule the world. As further incentive, he tells them all that in the future, they're all considered legends.

The group is iniially reluctant to join his cause, but eventually all agree. Hunter says he's not sure where to find Savage, but knows someone who does-- Professor Aldus Boardman. He lives in 1975 and has devoted his life to studying and tracking Savage.

The Legends travel in the Waverider, Hunter's time ship, to 1975. There they find Boardman, who gives them all his research on Savage. He also recognizes Hawkman and Hawkgirl, and reveals that he's the son of one of their previous reincarnations. When Hunter tells Hawkgirl that Boardman is destined to die in the next twenty four hours, she insists on taking him back to the Waverider to change history and save him.

When the group returns to the ship, they're attacked by Chronos, a temporal bounty hunter. They have a shootout with Chronos, and Boardman is wounded. They manage to make it into the ship and take off into the time stream. Unfortunately Boardman dies of his injuries, fulfilling history.

The Legends then demand to know why Chronos is after Hunter. He reveals that he stole the Waverider to seek revenge on Savage, who murdered his wife and son. His mission isn't sanctioned by the Time Masters, which is why they've sent Chronos after him. He also admits that he chose them all not because they're legendary heroes, but because they have little or no impact on future history.

The group is furious with Hunter, but eventually they all decide they're not going to accept their bland, pedestrian fates and will do whatever it takes to truly become Legends.

In the tag scene, Vandal Savage acquires a nuclear warhead and laughs menacingly.

Thoughts:

• Somebody at the DC TV office is a HUGE Doctor Who fan. Rip Hunter is pretty much playing the Doctor here. He's a time traveler with a British accent who wears an overcoat exactly like David Tennant's. He's played by Doctor Who alum Arthur Darvill, aka Rory Williams. He's a Time Lord, er, I mean Time Master, part of an elite group that guards Earth's timeline. He even stole a time machine and is now on the run from his own people! Oh, and his archenemy is an evil immortal with a beard. The only thing missing is a sonic screwdriver and a robot dog.

About the only difference between the two characters is that Hunter travels with eight companions instead of one or two.

• Rip Hunter warns the Time Masters that Vandal Savage must be stopped. He compares savage to evil dictators such as Stalin, Hitler and Per Degaton.

In the comics, Degaton was a time traveling WWII supervillain who often fought the Justice Society Of  America. He learned the secrets of time travel from a robot named Mechanique. He was also a master strategist, and a member of the Injustice Society.

By the way, it took me a minute to understand what Rip said here. I've always pronounced the character's name "Purr DAY-gah-taun." Rip pronounced it like it was all one word, like "Per-dah-gatunn."

• Rip's time ship is called the Waverider, and is controlled by Gideon, an artificial intelligence program.

I'm assuming the ship is named after the Waverider, a character from the comics who could travel through time by "riding" the time stream.

In Season 1 of The Flash, Dr. Wells, aka Eobard Thawne, used a futuristic computer intelligence called Gideon to help him get back to his own time. When Barry Allen, aka the Flash, discovered Gideon, she told him he would invent her in 2024. 

I'm assuming Rip Hunter's Gideon is related to the one Barry invents, as it would be too confusing to have two separate A.I.s with the same name.

• It was awesome seeing Firestorm fly around the skies over Pittsburgh. But once again I'm wondering if he'll ever exhibit the transmutational powers the character has in the comics. So far he's just been a Human Torch clone.

Do the producers think transmutation would confuse the audience? Or is seeing Firestorm turn incoming bullets into snowflakes just not in the effects budget?

• After Hunter abducts everyone, they all wake up on a rooftop. Captain Cold looks to his right, sees the Professor  and says, "What are you doing here, Stein?"

How does Cold know Professor Stein? Did he ever meet Firestorm over on The Flash? 

• Hunter tries to get the group to join his cause by telling them they're all legends in his time. Professor Stein balks at this, saying, "Uh, I hate to nitpick, but doesn't a legend have to be dead?" 

What's the Professor worried about? Rip Hunter's from 150 years in the future. He could live to be a hundred and twenty and he'd still by dead before Hunter's even born. 

• When the team goes back in time to the 1970s, Captain Cold, Heat Wave and White Canary decide to sneak out of The Waverider and go out for a drink. In the bar, Heat Wave remarks that he loves the 70s because they have dollar beers. So how'd he pay for them? Modern dollar bills look quite different from the ones used in the 70s.

He also somehow starts up the jukebox without inserting any money into it.

• The Legends travel to St. Roch, Louisiana to find Dr. Aldus Boardman. Boarman's actually appeared before, via a video recording in the episode Legends Of Yesterday over on Arrow. 

Also In the comics, St. Roch was home of Hawkman & Hawkwoman for a time.

• Boardman tells Hawkgirl that in a way she's his mother. He's the son of one of her and Hawkman's previous reincarnations. Because of this, he looks like he's in his sixties while Hawkgirl looks to be twenty five or so.

There was a very similar storyline a few years ago on Doctor Who. Amy Pond and Rory Williams (played by Arthur Darvill, who stars as Rip Hunter here) were both in their twenties and found out that they were the parents of time-travelling cat burglar/assassin River Song, who appeared to be in her late forties or early fifties.

• After meeting Boardman and returning to the ship, a temporal bounty hunter called Chronos appears, looking for Rip Hunter.

There was a Chronos in the comics, but he had a vastly different look and origin. He was a supervillain who used clock-themed gadgets, and often clashed with the Atom.

• The Atom's suit blasters sounded exactly like Iron Man's repulsors. You know, that "wheeeeeee" sound that's similar to a camera's flash attachment recharging, followed by a blast? I shouldn't be surprised by this, since the Atom is very, very similar to Iron Man. I guess Marvel didn't copyright their sound effects?

• Ray Palmer was one of Professor Stein's students. Typically for Palmer though, the Professor doesn't remember him.

• While I enjoyed the episode overall, there was one part I absolutely hated.

After Rip Hunter recruits the various heroes, Professor Stein is keen to sign up, eager to travel through time and see the wonders of the universe. His partner Jefferson is terrified by the prospect, and refuses to go. 

So what does Stein do? Have a calm and rational discussion with his friend? Promise him anything if only he'll go? Nope! He simply slips him a roofie and kidnaps him! Worst of all he performs these shocking actions with all the dispassion that a normal person would display in making toast. Jesus Christ! 

This was a HUGE misstep on the part of the writers. Besides the creep factor involved with a middle aged man drugging a twenty year old boy for his own purposes, there's the fact that these are most definitely not the actions of someone who's supposed to be a super hero. Heck, even Captain Cold and Heat Wave seemed appalled by Stein's actions.

Worst of all, the entire incident is quickly swept under the rug, forgotten by all the other characters, along with the writers who are probably desperately hoping the audience forgets about it too.

By the way, why the hell does a middle-aged professor like Stein have such easy access to roofies in the first place? It's almost like this isn't the first time he's done this...

Later on when the group finds out they were chosen because history doesn't remember them, Stein sits down with Jefferson and has an actual heart to heart conversation with him. He says he wanted to go on this mission because he's getting old, and he doesn't know how many more chances he'll have to experience the wonder of the cosmos. Jefferson can understand a sentiment like that, and agrees to accompany him.

Too bad the writers didn't use this scene earlier and scrap the roofie debacle.

I'm worried that the writers may have irreparably damaged Professor Stein's character with this little stunt. Hopefully they'll find a way to redeem him somehow.

The Flash Season 2, Episode 8: Legends Of Today

This week on The Flash we get our annual Flash/Arrow Crossover Event. We also get yet another episode that sets up The CW's upcoming series Legends Of Tomorrow. I have to admit after seeing a trailer for the series, it looks amazing, but Jesus! Enough with the setups already!

Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that these shows all share the same wacky universe. And there's nothing wrong with the occasional reference to another show or nod to a character. After all, Marvel Studios has built quite an impressive empire doing just that. But sidelining a show's main storyline just to set up another series feels cheap, crass and unnecessary. And so far The Flash has devoted at least four episodes to setting up Legends just this season!

It reminds me of those clumsy "backdoor pilots" that ran rampant on TV in the 1960s and 1970s. Like when The Brady Bunch focused an entire episode on their neighbors the Kelly Kids, in a transparent (and futile) effort to jumpstart a new series.

This setup episode wasn't quite as blatant as some of the others have been, but I'll be very glad when Legends Of Tomorrow finally premieres so The Flash can get back to dealing with the trials and tribulations of its own characters.

SPOILERS!

The Plot:

Caitlin and Harry worry that Barry's speed isn't increasing despite his heavy training. Harry warns that Zoom is at least four times faster than Barry. Caitlin and Harry then work on a way to increase Barry's speed.

Meanwhile Vandal Savage arrives in custody in Central City. He easily kills his captors with his awesome knife-throwing skills and escapes. Kendra invites Cisco to Jitters for an after hours (I guess?) dinner. Savage breaks in, addresses Kendra as Priestess Shayera and says he's there to kill her. Luckily Cisco's faster at texting than I am, and alerts Barry, who zooms in and saves them. Savage gets away.

Barry brings Kendra to STAR Labs to protect her, because why not let yet another person know his secret identity? Somehow Barry knows there's something mystical about Savage, and they'll need help dealing with him. For some reason he believes the best person to help is his pal Arrow, who has absolutely no superpowers whatsoever. He rushes to Star City and saves Arrow from Damien Darhk. Barry, the STAR Labs Gang and Kendra all meet in Oliver's Arrow Cave (or whatever he calls it). Computer whiz Felicity Smoak looks up Vandal Savage's Facebook page and discovers he hasn't aged since at least 1975.

Oliver invites Team Flash to his apartment for drinks. Savage shows up and attacks them. He easily deflects most of Oliver's arrows, but Speedy gets off a lucky shot and knocks him off the balcony. Of course when they all run over to look at the street far below, Savage is gone. Malcolm Merlyn and his League of Assassins then appear (!) to deliver some exposition, telling them all that Vandal Savage is an evil immortal.

Kendra freaks out at this (a guy who can run at Mach 2 doesn't bother her, but a man who lives forever apparently does) and runs out onto the street. Cisco chases after her and sees Hawkman swoop down and capture her. Flash and Arrow manage to subdue Hawkman and chain him up. He tells them his name is Carter Hall, but he's really the reincarnation of Prince Khufu of Egypt. He says Kendra is the reincarnation of Priestess Shayera, also of Egypt. Savage has killed them 206 times, and Hawkman says he needs Kendra/Shayera's help to prevent a 207th. He also says that every time Savage kills the two of them, he gets stronger.

Hawkman tells Kendra she has to "emerge" and remember her true identity of Shayera. To do this she needs to leap off the top of a tall building, which will activate her submerged, true self. She does so, and at the last minute her wings emerge from her body and she begins flying around Star City.

Back at STAR Labs, Caitlin and Harry come up with a formula they dub Velocity-6, which will temporarily give Barry extra speed. Patty Spivot waltzes into the lab unannounced and sees Harry. Thinking he's the Earth-1 Harrison Wells, she shoots him in the chest! Yikes! Jay Garrick just happens to show up right about then, and Caitlin tells him he needs to take the Velocity-6 to regain his super speed, or Harry will die. Jay reluctantly does so, and vibrates his hand into Harry's chest to remove the bullet. He then growls to Caitlin that he's never taking the drug again and leaves. This guy's supposed to be a hero?

Meanwhile, Barry and Ollie go back to Central City to keep Vandal Savage from stealing the Staff of Horus, which for some reason is located inside a massive cathedral. They arrive too late, as Savage already has the staff. They battle him for a while before Savage causes a massive explosion and gets away.

Back at Jitters, Barry and Oliver chat. A young boy (holding a Flash action figure!) bumps into Ollie, and runs to his mother. Oliver recognizes the woman-- he had an affair with her years ago, and realizes the boy is most likely his son.

Thoughts:

• According to Barry's cosmic treadmill, his top speed is currently 1,375 mph. Caitlin says the fastest he's ever run was Mach 2, when he went back in time last season.

This brings up an overlooked problem with the depiction of superspeed on this show. 1,375 mph doesn't seem like it would be fast enough for Barry to be able to pluck speeding bullets and arrows out of the air as if they were standing still.

Plus we current have airplanes that fly Mach 2 and beyond, and they don't travel backwards in time.

• Harry's says Zoom is three to four times faster than Barry. I'm not quite sure how he knows this, but there you go. Maybe he aimed a radar gun at him back on Earth-2.

• On a date with Cisco, Kendra unlocks the door of Jitters, where she's cooked up a private meal for just the two of them. 

Either Jitters is only open 9 to 5, or they're eating dinner after the place closes at 11pm. Something tells me the producers didn't want to build an apartment set that'd only be used one time.

• Inside Jitters, the Flash appears and saves Cisco and Kendra from Vandal Savage. A grateful Cisco then blurts out Barry's name in front of Kendra. There's yet ANOTHER person who knows his true identity. I honestly don't know why he even bothers with the mask at this point.

• Vandal Savage is played by actor Casper Crump. Now THAT'S a comic book name if ever I heard one. Just like Peter Parker or Bruce Banner.

• There seems to be great confusion as to how to spell "Shayera." I've seen various websites spell it "Shayera" as well as "Shiera." The closed captioning on my TV even spelled it "Chay-ara!" I'm sticking with Shayera.

• Barry decides that Team Arrow would be the perfect choice to protect Kendra from the mystically-powered Vandal Savage. I have no idea why he'd think that, other than as an excuse for a crossover. Nobody on Team Arrow has superpowers, mystical or otherwise.

Barry makes an excuse that Ollie and his gang have experience with mystic forces, but it's pretty weak. It would have made more sense if Team Arrow had been the ones to bring Kendra to Central City, where superheroes run rampant.

• When we first see Arrow, he's busy having his life drained by his nemesis Damien Darhk. Fortunately for him, Barry arrives in the nick of time and zooms Ollie to safety.

So if Barry hadn't arbitrarily decided he needed Arrow's help, Darhk apparently would have killed him!

And really, Darhk? Is that extra "H" supposed to make him sound more evil or something (Sorry, I haven't been watching Arrow)?

• Felicity invents a magnetic arrow for Arrow, that can rip the gun from an opponent's hands. Now that's a powerful magnet!

• Barry's dressed as the Flash when the two teams first meet in the Arrow Cave. Felicity suggests they all go to Oliver's apartment to talk shop. Cut to Ollie's place, and suddenly Barry's wearing street clothes!

Um... where'd he get the extra set of duds? They fit perfectly, so I doubt he borrowed them from Oliver. Was he wearing a blazer under his Flash costume? Maybe he ran home to Central City in three seconds, changed and ran back!

• Caitlin and Harry invent Velocity-6, a drug that will temporarily boost a speedster's power. Harry mentions that he's tried to come up with a speed-boosting compound before. I guess he tried and failed five times?

• In addition to being a superhero and a CSI, Barry's also an accomplished artist. He whips out a very impressive sketch of Vandal Savage in no time flat.

• Patty saunters right into STAR Labs, sees Harry, and thinking he's the evil Earth-1 Harrison Wells, shoots him. Maybe if Joe would tell her what's going on once in a while, she might not go around shooting people from Earth-2.

As for her walking into STAR Labs unannounced, I could swear that during the season premiere Cisco said he'd upped the security so people could no longer wander into the lab off the street.

• No Iris this week. I guess The CW couldn't afford her paycheck this week, what with all the extra guest stars.

• This was another of those "stage episodes" I keep talking about. The ones where the numerous characters arrange themselves like they're actors on a stage.

• Hawkman and Hawkgirl are the reincarnated spirits of a couple of Egyptian superheroes, which aligns more or less with the comics.

The Hawks have the most convoluted and confusing histories in all of comic-dom. It would take several days and a hundred thousand words to properly explain it all, so I won't even try. 

Basically the Golden Age Hawkman and Hawkwoman were reincarnated Egyptians, just like here. The Silver Age versions were alien cops (!) who came to Earth to study our criminology methods.

Then sometime in the 1980s all hell broke loose, and DC tried to combine the two versions, and they've never been the same since.

• I'm waiting for the PC Police to complain that someone who calls himself Prince Khufu is being played by a white German man.

• So if Vandal Savage gets more powerful every time he kills the Hawks, do they get weaker?

• Hawkman tells Kendra she can awaken the dormant Hawkgirl spirit inside her by jumping off a building. Being a rational kind of gal, Kendra's reluctant to do so. Barry actually gives her one of The Flash's patented "Believe in yourself" speeches. Oy.

I could happily live the rest of my life without ever hearing those three words ever again.

• Barry and Ollie decide to go to Central City and stop Savage from getting the Headpiece to the Staff of Ra the Staff of Horus. They pause dramatically in front of a wall in the Arrow Cave, which opens to reveal their respective costumes.

Why does Barry have a Flash suit inside Arrow's headquarters? I suppose maybe he stashed it there during their little party earlier?

• After being shot by Patty, Harry is dying and not even Caitlin can save him. She finally has to literally bully Jay Garrick into taking the Velocity-6 potion so he can regain his super speed long enough to vibrate the bullet out of Harry.

I am not a fan of the way the series has treated Jay Garrick so far. I was excited when he first showed up, as I expected some fun super-speed competition between him and Barry. But the writers made the puzzling decision to de-power Jay, and as a result he's been reduced to little more than a cheap Earth-2 expository device, and a lukewarm love interest for Caitlin.

And to make things even worse, this episode paints him as a Grade A jerk! I get that he's not fond of Harry and doesn't trust him, but he's still a human being and he's dying. Jay should have to be coerced into saving him. Doesn't seem very heroic, does it?

Hopefully once the series gets all this Legends stuff out of its system, it can focus on salvaging Jay and turning him into a proper hero.