I've Got A Bad Feeling About This...

After what seems like eons, the Farrelly Brothers (the There's Something About Mary guys) finally revealed an official cast photo from their upcoming Three Stooges movie, due in theaters next year.

As a life-long Stooges fan, I've been following the progress of this movie with a mixture of fascination and outright horror for years. It's been in development for a good decade, no exaggeration. A veritable truckload of actors have been attached to the project at some point or another. At one time the cast was going to be Benecio Del Torro as Moe, Sean Penn (!) as Larry, and Jim Carrey as Curly, who reportedly was willing to gain fifty pounds for the role.

Finally the official cast has been nailed down and filming is finally underway: Will Sasso (MadTV) as Curly, Chris Diamantopoulos (whoever that is) as Moe, and Sean Hays (Will & Grace) as Larry.

I'll give credit where credit is due: they certainly have the look of the Stooges down, although Larry looks disturbingly like a close relative of freakish prop-comic Carrot Top in the photo above. Looks aside though, I just don't see how this can possibly work.

The movie will reportedly be broken up into three half hour shorts, similar to the Stooge films of yore. But— and here's the part that worries me— they're updating it to the present day. That means plenty of drug, sex and fart jokes will no doubt abound, something that, in my opinion, doesn't belong in the Stooge Universe (Stoogiverse?).

Also troubling are reports of cameo appearances by the cast of Jersey Shore, which dates the movie before it even comes out. I would rather watch a continuous loop of Nazis burning puppies alive than watch even ten seconds of even one of the Jersey Shore cretins.

Who knows, though? Maybe the Stooge movie will surprise me and it'll actually turn out well. The Stooges first became popular way back at the height of the Great Depression. The country's deep in the crapper of another Depression again, so maybe the Stooges are just what we need.