Friday, September 28, 2012

Close Call Part 2

Yesterday a British policeman in Worcestershire (love their sauce) was making his normal night rounds, when he spotted what he described as a "suspicious bright light." He radioed the station to alert them that he was going to investigate the light, and might need backup.

A few minutes later he radioed the station again to inform them that the suspicious light was actually... the moon.

This cop needs to team up with the Air Canada pilot from last April. The one who dove his plane toward the ocean in an effort to avoid the planet Venus.

As a public service, I would just like to remind everyone that when you look up into the sky you may occasionally see one or more large round bright objects. Do not be alarmed. These objects are merely Sky Spirits, members of a race of large glowing super beings who live on the surface of the gargantuan dome which hangs above the flat plane of the Earth.

The most common of the Sky Spirits are the Yellow Face, which appears as a large, hot glowing ball and is usually visible during the daytime, and the Cold Face, a smaller white globe that can change its shape and appears during the day and the night.

The Sky Spirits are mostly harmless, although when angered, the Yellow Face can cause your skin to blister and peel.

If the presence of the Sky Spirits makes you uncomfortable, it is possible to frighten them back into their underground lairs. Merely go out into your yard and bang on a metal trash can lid or on any pots and pans available. Chanting and shrieking at the Spirits is also advised. It may take a while, in some cases up to twelve hours, but eventually your display will frighten them and they'll disappear below the horizon.

Be advised that they won't stay scared for long though, and will likely reappear the next day.

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