Enjoy this terrifying Tale From The Grocery. All Tales are 100% true.
One night a man came through my checkout line with a LIT cigarette dangling from his mouth! What the hell, did he just come from 1985? You haven't been allowed to smoke inside a public building in decades.
He acted like he was already half drunk and was buying more mind-numbing booze, so he may not have even realized he was inside.
When I told him-- in between coughs-- that he had to put out his coffin nail, he yanked it out of his mouth and made a pitiful attempt to hide it behind his back. Wow, where'd your cigarette go, David Copperfield? I rang him up as quickly as I could to get him the hell out of the store and my life.