Wednesday, January 8, 2014

A Public Service Announcement For Grandmothers Buying Videos For Their Grandkids

Grandmothers: In just a few weeks your grandkids will be asking you to buy the movie Frozen for them on home video. Be warned that the video store, with its miles of similar DVD covers, can be a frightening and confusing place. So before you venture out to purchase it, study the following carefully.

This is Frozen. It was released by Disney in 2013 and is loosely based on Hans Christian Andersen's story The Snow Queen

It's the story of Elsa, who possesses cool snow-generating powers, and her younger sister Anna. After a jealous argument, Elsa plunges the city of Arendelle into Eternal Winter. When Anna sacrifices herself to save Elsa, she realizes love is the key to controlling her powers (sheesh) and the Winter Curse is lifted.

This is the 2010 film Frozen. It's the heartwarming (heh) story of three stupid college students who become stranded on a ski lift hundreds of feet above the frozen ground after the lodge closes down for the week. The three friends realize the horror of their situation as darkness falls, the temperature plunges and a pack of ravenous wolves prowls the ground beneath them. 

They then have to choose between slowly freezing to death on the ski lift, or being torn to pieces by the hungry wolves below.

See? They're practically the same movie! No wonder you're confused!

To muddy the waters even further, the 2010 Frozen stars Emma Bell, while the 2013 Frozen stars the voice of Kristen Bell. Baffling!

Be advised that your grandchildren will most likely be pestering you for the 2013 Frozen. If you buy them the 2010 version, the state may ban you from seeing them again.

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