Yes, it's Dash Buttons, those must-have marvels of our electronic age that will streamline the tedious chore of online shopping and enrich all our lives!
As advertised, you simply purchase one of the hundred or so different Dash Buttons from Amazon— for example, Arm & Hammer Cat Litter. When it arrives, you begin the complicated and lengthy process of hooking it up to your home's wifi and then tethering it to your smart phone.
Days later when you've completed that task, you simply stick the Dash Button to a wall. When you run out of cat litter, merely push the button on the device and it'll beam a signal to your phone, which will place an order with Amazon. Cut to a mere two days later, and your cat litter will be delivered right to your door! What could be simpler? Well, besides sitting down at the computer and taking thirty seconds to order cat litter online. But hey, these things look cool, right? Right?
Think of the seconds you'll save by using Dash Buttons!
And I suppose it might be convenient to have one of these next to your throne, so you don't find yourself "stranded," if you know what I mean.
Note that even if you have Amazon Prime, it's still gonna take two days for your Quilted Northern to arrive to your door, so… get comfortable.
And does anyone really need a device whose only function is to order Goldfish Crackers?
Of course after eating all those massive quantities of food, this Dash Button's probably going to come in handy.
I doubt that even the most unattractive woman in the country needs her face cream delivered in bulk.
"Quickly! I need five hundred cases of Play-Doh, STAT! I've got to roll a thousand clay snakes between my hands by noon, or the President dies! Activate the Dash Button pronto!"
I guess this one would come in handy if you ever found yourself in an emergency in which you needed a bulk shipment of foam rubber footballs, or a gross of dart guns.
Dash Buttons! Ask for them by name! Or don't, and just order your supplies online.