Tuesday, February 20, 2018

"One Ticket, Please"

This past weekend, two youths in California attempted to sneak one of them into a showing of Black Panther by disguising themselves as a really, really tall man. Sadly, they weren't successful. Despite the fact that the ruse has worked in countless cartoons and Little Rascals shorts over the years, the theater manager reportedly turned them away.

Silly kids! That's not the way to sneak into a movie! Everyone knows the proper way is to walk backwards into the theater while loudly commenting, "I say, that was an excellent motion picture!"

There's another sure-fire idea that'd be guaranteed to work in today's touchy-feely society, but it would require a third kid. Two of them would dress up in a pantomime horse costume. The third kid would dress normally and buy a ticket for himself. He'd then say he was brining his "emotional support horse" with him, and the other two kids could clip-clop into the theater behind him. It can't fail!

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