Cancel Culture

I've been seeing these headlines on the Yahoo homepage LITERALLY every day for the past year. No lie, it pops up every. single. day.

Based on the prevalence of this "news" item, I've come to the conclusion that either Yahoo has been running the exact same story for 365 days, or Netflix has 23,000 TV series in its current lineup.

Alcafinale

FOX announced today that it's pulling the plug on Alcatraz. Crap in a hat! I discussed my feelings about the first season in an earlier post, so I won't dredge them up again. Let's just say I had high hopes for the show (since it was sort of a cousin of LOST) but was profoundly disappointed with how it played out.

I was hoping it would get renewed and, now that we'd been introduced to the show's universe, things would kick into high gear and the second season would see a large improvement. Alas, it's not to be. Now we'll never how things would have played out.

This in a nutshell is why I rarely if ever watch TV anymore. I'm always reluctant to get all invested in a new program only to have it yanked out from under me, leaving the storyline in limbo.

It happens to me over and over again. I'm convinced that there's a direct line between my TV set and the networks, manned by a large room full of lab-coated technicians who constantly monitor my viewing habits. Banks of computers with blinking lights and spinning tape spools tirelessly analyze what I'm watching. Hundreds of printouts and graphs provide up to the minute details on my TV preferences. The second it's determined that I'm regularly tuning in to a particular show, the lab becomes a hive of activity as the team springs into action. The lead technician barges into the network President's office, saying, "Sir, we've detected a pattern in the Canada household. Apparently he's tuned into Alcatraz every Monday for the past 13 weeks." "Damn," exclaims the President. "I had high hopes for that show, and the late season ratings were beginning to show improvement. Ah well. You know what has to be done. We don't have to like the law, but we do have to follow it. Pull the plug!" Laugh if you will, but I firmly believe this is true.

Now thanks to FOX I wasted 13 hours of my life on this ferkakta show, for nothing.

I'm pretty much done with network TV for good. I'll just stick with my DVDs of All In The Family and The Monkees, thank you very much. At least I know those shows won't be unexpectedly cancelled.