Thursday, February 5, 2015

Remember His Name

The upcoming Star Trek 3 (or 13, depending on how you count them) has been in the news quite a bit the past few months. Back in December, Paramount Pictures announced they were firing director Roberto Orci, co-writer of the execrable Star Trek Into Darkness (the one with Not-Khan in it) and replacing him with Justin Lin, director of four of the Fast & Furious films. Because Lord knows, if there's one thing a cerebral sci-fi series like Star Trek needs, it's more souped-up muscle cars and over the top, high-speed chase scenes.

Apparently the studio's really fed up with Orci, because last month they announced they were torpedoing his script and hiring actor Simon Pegg, who's played Scotty in the previous two films, as screenwriter for the new opus. Pegg co-wrote the Cornetto Trilogy (Shaun Of The Dead, Hot Fuzz and The World's End) along with the sci-fi comedy Paul. Pegg is also a professionally butt-hurt celebrity, who responded to fan criticisms of Into Darkness by saying, "It absolutely isn't the worst Star Trek movie. It's asinine, you know? It's ridiculous. And frustrating. To be subject to that level of sort of, like, crass f*cking ire, I just say f*ck you." Wise words indeed from a true professional.

Star Trek 3 was in the news yet again this week, as rumors are flying that the film's main villain will be a male, and Paramount is reportedly looking for a "Bryan Cranston-like" actor to play him. Bryan Cranston-like? What the hell does that even mean? Someone? Anyone? Did I really just read that?

Surely they mean they want a "Walter White-like" villain, right? Someone who's a ruthless criminal mastermind and murderer? Yes? Please tell me that's what they really mean?

Or perhaps they're going against expectations and they want a villain who's similar to the bumbling but well-meaning Hal from Malcolm In The Middle? Or Snizard from Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers?

Who knows, maybe they really do want a villain who's just like the real life Bryan Cranston. I've never thought of him as particularly evil, as he appears to be a decent person who's very accommodating to his fans, but what do I know? Maybe he's got a mean streak no one knows about.

Paramount is desperate to get the film into theaters by next year at all costs, as 2016 marks the 50th Anniversary of the premiere of the original Star Trek series. Based on these current news reports and updates, I have utter confidence that it'll be a fine piece of cinema.

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