Apparently after 23 years of marriage, Edith finally got fed up with Archie's crap. "Alright for you, Ahhchie Bunka" she said as she calmly sneaked up behind him during one of his rants. She clocked him in the back of the head with a rolling pin and he dropped like a sack of wet cement.
She laid him out on the kitchen table and stared with detachment at his unconscious form for a few minutes. Then with clinical precision she bent over him and scooped out both his eyeballs with a measuring spoon.
She then mounted the eyeballs on the kitchen cabinet as a grisly warning to the rest of the household.
"We'll see who stifles now!" she croaked in a flat, emotionless tone.
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