It's Finally Over

At last, our long national nightmare is finally over.

It's been a long and grueling four years since the Orange One was elected. Jesus Christ, has it really only been four years? It seems more like twenty. 

Every morning for the last four years I'd crawl out of bed and cautiously check the news, fearful to read what the Embarrassment-In-Chief had done during the night. And every time I thought, "Well, this is the worst thing he's ever done, and he can't possibly top it," he'd find a way. I don't think I've ever hated a person more than Donald J. Trump. 

Given all that, one would think I'd be dancing in the streets right now, deliriously happy that he's finally been defeated. Sadly, that's not the case. 

The fact that this wasn't the largest blue landslide in our history is nothing less than a national disgrace. Biden won by less than 3% of the popular vote! Less than 3%! I've never been more disappointed in this country, and I'm honestly ashamed to be an American right now.

How the hell could any sane and rational person look at trump's record and think, "Yes, I want four more years of that, please!" What the fuck? Sweeping aside all his lies and corruption, the man's responsible for almost 240,000 Covid deaths. And make no mistake, his reckless actions and policies are responsible for every one of those casualties— just as surely as if he'd pointed a gun to each of their heads and pulled the trigger himself.

And yet somehow he came very close to being reelected. What the fuck is wrong with you, America? You're like a battered wife who's still in love with her alcoholic, abusive husband and refuses to leave.

I honestly feel like there's no place for me here anymore. Seriously. I've half a notion to just pack up and move to another country, but unfortunately thanks to trump's Covid non-response, no other nation will let American exiles in.

Just to be clear here, I'm not a huge fan of Joe Biden either. That doesn't mean I dislike him though— far from it. He seems like a good person, and I think he'll do a decent job with the mess he's inherited. I'm just not a rabid follower. I mostly supported him because I just wanted the Horrible Orange Thing to go away.

It's really telling that when Biden addressed the nation after the election, his calm, rational words felt like a startling revelation. He seemed filled with poise and wisdom, but in reality he was simply speaking like a normal human— something trump is incapable of ever doing.