Let Them Eat Cake!

Back in February, I decided I was going to start a new feature here at Bob Canada's BlogWorld, in which I would chronicle all the batsh*t insane things our Glorious Leader Trump did each week.

Sadly, I threw in the towel after just two installments. Why? Because I literally could not keep up with all the crap that Trumpy did and said on a daily basis. It would take me ten hours a day, every day. I am not kidding. It's that bad.

Actually I'm glad I did give up, because listing all the bizarre things he utters and all the atrocities he's committing was frankly just too depressing.

So I've contented myself with occasionally talking about the REALLY outrageous things he says and does. Like this one!

Last Wednesday (April 12, 2017), Glorious Leader Trump sat down for an interview with Maria Bartiromo (whoever that is) of the Fox Business Network (whatever that is). Bartiromo asked Trump about his decision to bomb Syria just a few days earlier. His responses are nothing short of astonishing. Here's a just a taste of the interview:

Bartiromo: "Now, are we going to get involved with Syria?" 

Trump: "No. But if I see them using gas and using things that— I mean even some of the worst tyrants in the world didn't use the kind of gases that they used. And some of the gases are unbelievably potent. So when I saw that, I said we have to do something."

OK, he's rambling as usual, but so far not that bad.

The interview REALLY took an odd turn though, when Trump began talking about his new bestie, Chinese President Xi Jinping.

Trump: "I have a very, very good meeting with President Xi of China. I really liked him. We had a great chemistry, I think. I mean at least I had a great chemistry — maybe he didn't like me, but I think he liked me."

C'mon, Don, tell us! Did he like you, or did he LIKE YOU like you?

Trump: (still talking about President Xi) "We were going to have a 10 or a 15 minute sit-down. It lasted for three hours. Then the next day, it was another schedule, because everything is very orderly with the Chinese, frankly."

OK, subtly racist, but go on.

Trump: "And we had meetings scheduled. Well, the 15 minutes on the first day lasted for three hours. The 15 minutes on the second day lasted for two hours, just one-on-one, the two of us with interpreters. And I mean we understand each other. I think he's, you know, a person that I got along with really well. We had a good chemistry, yes."

I have absolutely no idea what the hell he's talking about here, what with his fifteen minutes that last three hours.

Here's the kicker though. Make sure you're sitting before you read his next blathering.

Trump: (still talking about his meeting with President Xi) "But I will tell you, only because you've treated me so good for so long, I have to right? I was sitting at the table. We had finished dinner. We're now having dessert. And we had the most beautiful piece of chocolate cake that you've ever seen and President Xi was enjoying it." 

"And I was given the message from the generals that the ships are locked and loaded, what do you do? And we made a determination to do it, so the missiles were on the way. And I said, Mr. President, let me explain something to you. This was during dessert. We've just fired 59 missiles, all of which hit, by the way, unbelievable, from, you know, hundreds of miles away, all of which hit, amazing."

Bartiromo: "Unmanned?"

Trump: "Brilliant. It's so incredible. It's brilliant. It's genius. Our technology, our equipment, is better than anybody by a factor of five. I mean look, we have, in terms of technology, nobody can even come close to competing. Now we're going to start getting it, because, you know, the military has been cut back and depleted so badly by the past administration and by the war in Iraq, which was another disaster."

"So what happens is I said we've just launched 59 missiles heading to Iraq and I wanted you to know this. And he was eating his cake. And he was silent."

Bartiromo: "To Syria?" 

Trump: "Yes. Heading toward Syria. In other words, we've just launched 59 missiles heading toward Syria. And I want you to know that, because I didn't want him to go home. We were almost finished. It was a full day in Palm Beach. We're almost finished and I— what does he do, finish his dessert and go home and then they say, you know, the guy you just had dinner with just attacked a country?"

Bartiromo: "How did he react?"

Trump: "So he paused for 10 seconds and then he asked the interpreter to please say it again. I didn't think that was a good sign. And he said to me, anybody that uses gases— you could almost say or anything else— but anybody that was so brutal and uses gases to do that young children and babies, it's OK."

So there you have it. Our President literally cannot be bothered to learn the name of the country he just bombed, but goddamn if he doesn't love him some some desert! No matter which side of the Syria situation you're on, you cannot deny that this is some bizarre fraking behavior.

Jesus wept. You know, going on and on almost orgiastically about a goddamned piece of chocolate cake while nonchalantly sending missiles to another country is so callous. Yeah, he's bombing an enemy force, but doing so while sitting in a luxurious resort, shoveling desert into his mouth... if that isn't the definition of decadent, then I don't know what is.

It feels like something President Snow would do in The Hunger Games!

This truly is the darkest timeline...