Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Four Out Of Five Dentists Agree

I went to the dentist today for a checkup. Whew! I'm glad that's over with. Now I can stop flossing for another 6 months.

I kid, I kid. Unlike most of the rabble, I actually do floss somewhat regularly. Admittedly not every day, but I try to do it at least three or four times a week.

For those of you who eschew flossing for most of the year and only start doing it a couple of days before your dental appointment, you're not fooling anyone you know. When your dentist asks you if you've been flossing in an accusatory tone, and you always say, "Why yes. Yes I have! Several times a day in fact. Every spare moment I can find," he knows you're a base charlatan and a big fat liar.

How does he know you're lying? For one thing, he went to a special tooth school. That's right, an entire school devoted to naught but the study of teeth; how many you should probably have, where they come from, and how much should be charged for painfully yanking them out of your mouth. So he knows more about teeth than you ever will.

The other way he knows you're not telling the truth is when he tells you to rinse in the little sink. If it looks like this after you spit, he knows you're a filthy liar.

1 comment:

  1. Hah, I agree! Your dentist will ALWAYS know what you’ve been doing with your teeth, whether or not you tell him anything! They’re trained to see the differences between normal, healthy teeth and everything else. The last time I visited my dentist, she told me almost as soon as she started looking that I had been chewing mostly on my left side because I had a problem with the teeth on the right side. I hadn’t told her any of this, but she knew right away!

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