Wednesday, November 25, 2009

The Trouble With Twilight

First off, let me just emphasize that I don't hate "Twilight," so to all of you Twihards out there, please don't burn down my house.

I haven't read any of the books, but I saw the first movie twice and thought it was OK. That said, there are a couple of things about the story that really bother me.

First off is the fact that despite his looks, vampire Edward Cullen is 107 years old, and he's dating a 17 year old human girl. Isn't that a little creepy?

When Edward's girlfriend Bella finds out how old he is, she doesn't even bat an eye and the matter is never mentioned again.

I know, I know, Edward's forever frozen at age 17. Be that as it may, it doesn't change the fact that he's walked the earth for over 100 years. You can't live that long and still think and act like a 17 year old. He's 107, folks.

I don't understand why none of the fans are bothered by this. No one ever questions it everyone accepts it without reservation.

If you don't think this is a fundamentally creepy scenario, try removing the supernatural elements and imagine Edward as an ordinary 107 year old human who's dating a 17 year old girl. See? Gross, right? And no doubt illegal, even in the Southern states.

My second problem with the story comes during the big scene in the forest when Edward confirms Bella's suspicions that he's a vampire. He tells her she shouldn't get involved with him because he's the perfect killing machine. He then admits to her that he's even killed before. Bella responds to this by saying, "It doesn't matter."

Cue the phonograph needle scratching a record sound effect!

Did Bella just say that her boyfriend's murder confession is no big deal? She reacts to his revelation with as much emotion and interest as if he just told her he's a habitual jaywalker. Her father is the town sheriff, for corn's sake! She just completely blows the whole thing off and simultaneously becomes an accessory to murder. I guess in the Twilight universe, if a murderer is sorry for his crime then all is forgiven and there won't be any consequences. Or a trial.

Once this little bombshell is dropped, it's swept under the rug, never to trouble the audience again, so they can get back to more important matters like squealing every time Edward appears on screen. Not really the best message to be sending out there to the tweens, is it?

Once again, remove the supernatural element and imagine Edward is a normal human who just confessed a murder to Bella. Suddenly Edward doesn't seem so dreamy, does he?

Surely I'm not the only person in the audience who noticed these things?

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