Sunday, February 3, 2013

Bosses From The Eighth Circle Of Hell: The Exercise Bike

Throughout my career I've prided myself on working hard, performing what's asked of me to the best of my ability and being an all-around good employee. I've also done my best to get along with my various bosses.

Alas, sometimes that's just not possible. Sometimes you end up with a Boss From The Eighth Circle Of Hell.

Back in the 1990s I worked at a marketing agency for a rather colorful Boss.


The Boss' office was a sight to behold. Every flat surface, including the floor, was stacked ridiculously high with books, papers and folders. It looked not unlike the image above, from the Time Enough At Last episode of Twilight Zone. You had to navigate through the stacks of crap just to get from the door to his desk.

In the middle of all this chaos stood the Boss' exercise bike. Every morning he'd come into his office, climb onto the bike, spread his newspaper out across the handlebars, and sit there and read. At no point during this time did his legs ever once move even a fraction of an inch.

He'd sit there on the bike sipping coffee and reading the paper for an hour or so, then finally climb off and start his day in earnest.

Of course at every opportunity he would tell anyone within earshot about how he "rode" his exercise bike for an hour every morning.

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