Sunday, September 4, 2022

Somebody Make It Stop!

Oh, Marvel Cinematic Universe. For eleven years you enthralled the world with your fun and action packed comic book films, introducing an entire new generation to the stable of Marvel characters.

It was a great ride, but all good things come to a close For three years now I've been saying the MCU officially, er, ended with Avengers: Endgame, and the franchise should be put to rest. And with with each subsequent Marvel movie and TV series that Disney pumps out, it looks like I'm increasingly right.

Somehow the MCU went from this...

To this.

Behold an image from Disney's latest Marvel opus, She-Hulk: Attorney At Law— in which the titular character— a prominent lawyer and strong, independent woman navigating a man's world— twerks in her office with Megan Thee Stallion, whoever the hell that is. Jesus wept.

Of course the producers of the She-Hulk series are loudly trumpeting the fact that it's written and directed solely by women, in order to properly capture the feminine perspective. Uh-huh. Take a look at that preposterous twerking shot above. What do you think would have happened if a lowly man had written that? There's no doubt in my mind he'd have been chased down by a gang of women, tarred, feathered and strung up by his balls. And then they'd have gotten mad!

She-Hulk premiered back in 1980, and was created solely by Marvel to cash in on the success of TV's The Bionic Woman. Her comic ran for two years before getting canceled. 

In 1989 artist/writer John Byrne revived the character in a new book titled 
The Sensational She-Hulk. I enjoyed his run quite a bit, as it was witty and irreverent, and best of all just plain fun. She-Hulk regularly broke the fourth wall and spoke directly to the audience (years before Deadpool ever thought to do so), making fun of numerous comic book tropes— and even insulting her writer.

The comic would have been a perfect template for the new TV series. All Disney had to do was change the jokes about comic books to quips about the sillier aspects of superhero movies. Boom! Done and done!

Of course that was too easy for Disney. Instead they inexplicably decided to go the woke route, filling the series with rants and rails against our male-dominated culture. Wow, how stunning and brave.

If that wasn't enough, the series is incredibly schizophrenic and hypocritical, as it denounces men and male attitudes in one scene, then immediately shows us that She-Hulk has a screensaver of Captain America's ass in the next (no, really!).

I don't want my happy memories of the She-Hulk comic tainted by such nonsense, so I'll be skipping this series and won't be reviewing it. 

The MCU is officially dead, but Disney just can't stop defiling its sad and withered corpse. For the love of god, just let it rest already!

R.I.P. Marvel Cinematic Universe
2008 - 2019

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