Saturday, April 25, 2020

Trump Vs. The Insane Clown Posse

I haven't posted much about the Embarrassment In Chief lately, because frankly it's just too depressing, and I don't need to deal with him on top of everything else that's going on right now. But I had to say something about this.

Warning: I've taken the filters off this post, so be advised.

For a month or so mow, trump's been holding daily coronavirus press briefings. The idea of the briefings is to ostensibly provide accurate information, guidance and comfort to a worried nation. Much like Roosevelt's fireside chats in the 1930s and 1940s.

Of course trump isn't capable of that kind of leadership, and has spent most of the briefings refusing to take responsibility for his mismanagement, blaming others for the state of the country and of course, spewing utter and transparent lies.

These briefings reaches a milestone on Thursday, April 23, 2020. Write down that date, kids, as someday it'll be in the history books alongside December 7, 1941 and September 11, 2001.

In the Thursday briefing, trump parroted info he'd overheard from his medical advisors, who claimed the coronavirus doesn't do well in hot, humid environments or direct sunlight. This apparently sparked an idea in trump's lizard brain, prompting him to say the following:

"So supposing we hit the body with a tremendous— whether it's ultraviolet or just a very powerful light— and I think you said that hasn't been checked because of the testing. And then I said, supposing you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or some other way, and I think you said you're going to test that, too."

So because he heard the virus can be killed by UV radiation, he somehow thinks a person could be cured by... shining a light down their throat, I guess? Putting them in a tanning booth and turning it up to eleven? Who the fuck knows.

Oh, but it gets better.

The "president" then went on to say:

"And then I see the disinfectant, where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning. Because you see it gets in the lungs and it does a tremendous number on the lungs. So it would be interesting to check that. So, that, you’re going to have to use medical doctors with. But it sounds, it sounds interesting to me.”

Jesus Motherfucking Jetskiing Christ On A Pony.

I fucking give up. I just can't do this anymore. And by this I mean live. I'm going to go lie down in the middle of the Lloyd Expressway.

The leader of the free world just asked if it would be possible to inject disinfectants into the human body to kill the coronavirus. A fucking six year old would know better than that!

Immediately after the briefing, actual medical professionals were quick to jump in and warn the public not to pay any attention to the orange man. 

Dr. Vin Gupta, a pulmonologist and global health policy expert, said, “This notion of injecting or ingesting any type of cleansing product into the body is irresponsible and it’s dangerous. It’s a common method that people utilize when they want to kill themselves (!)."

The makers of Lysol also hurriedly issued a statement, warning people not to drink or spray their product down their throats.

trump's ridiculous comments launched a flurry of news reports, along with a barrage of internet poss (like this one!) mocking his ill-advised and downright dangerous suggestions.


The fallout from his asinine ideas became so intense that the next day, he did what he does best and outright lied, claimed he wasn't serious about suggesting people drink bleach, but was instead being sarcastic.

"I was asking a question sarcastically to reporters just like you, just to see what would happen," Trump said on Friday during a bill signing for the coronavirus aid package. "I was asking a sarcastic and a very sarcastic question to the reporters in the room about disinfectant on the inside. But it does kill it and it would kill it on the hands, and it would make things much better."

A couple things here. First of all, it's abundantly clear to anyone who saw the video of the briefing that there was no note of sarcasm whatsoever in his voice. Plus he repeatedly addressed his medical advisors as he asked them if chugging Windex would cure the virus. At no time did he ever speak to any reporters.

Secondly, even if he was telling the truth for once in his life here— why the holy fuck was he being sarcastic during a press briefing concerning a disease that's killed over 50,000 Americans to date? There's a time and place for sarcasm, and this ain't it.

Meanwhile, hip-hop/horrorcore group The Insane Clown Posse announced they were cancelling their annual "Gathering Of The Juggalos" festival this year, due to the viral apocalypse.

Band members Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope tweeted, "The bottom line is that we REFUSE to risk even ONE Juggalo life by hosting a Gathering during these troubling times."

Jesus wept, a pair of rappers in clown makeup are officially more rational and compassionate than the leader of the country. Congratulations, Universe! You win! 

Sunday, April 19, 2020

M-O-O-N, That Spells "I'm Done!"

As readers of Bob Canada's BlogWorld know far too well, my all-time favorite novel is Stephen King's The Stand. I first discovered it back in 1979, and have read it at least thirty or forty times since.

So naturally when I heard it was finally being adapted into a big budget film, I began following the project closely. Unfortunately, each update on the production has been more appalling than the last. 

First was the fact it was being written and directed by Josh Boone. Who better to helm a post apocalyptic horror epic than the director of the teen cancer tearjerker The Fault In Our Stars? Oy.

Then in 2014 there was the news that Boone wanted to cram the entire story into ONE measly three hour movie. Jesus wept. The Stand is a massive book with a huge cast of characters— at least 28 by my count. It'd be impossible include them all into a three hour film. The 1994 ABC miniseries was six hours long. Even at that length they had to drop certain characters and combine others, as well as eliminate entire subplots. There's no way in hell a two or even three hour version could do justice to the book.

A few months later Boone changed his mind, saying he now wanted to split the story into four theatrical films (huzzah!). He also said he wanted these films to be more "grounded" than the novel (boooo!). Yes, because when you're dealing with a supernatural story about good vs. evil, it should be as pedestrian as possible.

A year later (in 2015) Boone changed his mind yet again, saying he now planned on turning The Stand into an eight part miniseries on Showtime. OK, not quite the same as a theatrical release, but the story would definitely benefit from the extra time. But then in a bizarre turn he said he planned to conclude the story in a theatrical film. Son of a bitch! Who the hell's going to go to the cineplex to see the end of a goddamned TV show?

Then in 2016 Boone announced the whole thing was "temporarily on hold." Meaning the studio got tired of waiting on his ass and canceled the project.

Then in 2019 The Stand resurfaced again. It would now be a ten episode miniseries on CBS: All Access, the fine folks who've brought us two miserable seasons of Star Trek: Discovery (aka STD), along with the execrable Picard series.


As you can see, it's been a long, winding, miserable road.

Despite any misgivings I may have had about the project, I was hopeful that it might turn out OK. When the main cast was announced, I thought most of the choices were satisfactory, with just a few that generated mild concern.

Welp, that all went out the window with the most recent casting news, causing more red flags to pop up than in a Chinese military parade.

First up was the news that Fiona Dourif (daughter of character actor Brad Dourif) was cast as a gender-flipped Rat Man. As I said, I've read the novel thirty or forty times, but even I had to stop and think, "Who the hell's the Rat Man?" I finally remembered him, as he's a VERY minor character in the novel, one who gets maybe two or three lines.

See ladies? CBS All Access cares so much about female representation that they cast a woman in a forgettable Z-level role! Progressive!

And what's she gonna be called now? Will she still be the Rat Man? Rat Woman? Rat Man Woman?

I couldn't figure out why they were making a huge deal over such an inconsequential character. Then it hit me— she's NOT going to be trivial character in this adaptation. They're boosting her up to a major role.

And then I noticed that there's no mention of the Trashcan Man in the cast list. He's a major character in the novel, and becomes even more important in the third act. It would not surprise me if they're eliminating Trashy and substituting Rat Man Woman in his place.

So that's how it's gonna be then. We're doing CHANGES to the source material now. Got it. Because gods forbid we have a faithful adaptation of a successful and beloved novel, laws no. It must be drastically altered as the filmmakers put their own personal stamps on it, as they eliminate everything that made it popular in the first place.

My suspicions were confirmed when CBS proudly announced they'd cast Katherine McNamara (whoever that is) as Julie Lawry, who, according to the press release, is "a woman who hooks up with Lloyd Henreid in Las Vegas."

Wait a minute... that's not right. In the novel, Julie Lawry's an unstable teen who tries to kill Nick Andros and his pal Tom Cullen in Kansas. Later she makes her way to Las Vegas, and becomes an informant to Lloyd. They do NOT "hook up" though, as Lloyd actively hates Julie and thinks she's a nuisance.

At first I thought whoever wrote the article just wasn't familiar with the source material, but then I realized that the characters' ill-advised coupling was yet another change being made to the source material.

And then there's the casting of Jovan Adepo as Larry Underwood, one of the seven main characters in the novel. Larry's white in the book, and is a singer who has a hit soul song right before the superflu hits. It's kind of a running gag that everyone assumes he's black based on his singing voice. Oh, the irony! I guess they won't be doing THAT joke in the movie!

So was Adepo just a diversity hire to bolster the miniseries' representation, or is it now offensive for a white person to sing soul music here in hyper-sensitive 2020?

By far the most appalling bit of casting is that of Brad William Henke as Tom Cullen. 

Jesus Motherf*cking Jetskiing Christ On A Cracker! Tom Cullen's supposed to be a kind, gentle, mildly mentally disabled man, who's the heart and soul of the story. He's not supposed to be the goddamned Mountain from Game Of Thrones! The audience is supposed to like Tom, not piss itself every time he glowers at us!

And if all that wasn't enough, Stephen King himself stepped up and announced he's written a brand new ending to the miniseries.

THAT'S IT! I am officially out. I was willing to put up with all the twists and turns this production's been through so far, because I desperately wanted to see a top notch, faithful adaptation of my favorite book.

It's clear to me now though that's not gonna happen. This miniseries will be The Stand in name only.

And yes, as I mentioned before I'm aware that the 1994 ABC miniseries made quite a few changes to the characters and story as well. I gave it a pass though, as it was hampered by a its length, budget and TV censorship. They had no choice but to alter things. This CBS All Access version has none of those restrictions, so there's no reason for any radical changes.

So I'm done. Life's too short to keep subjecting myself to subpar and disappointing versions of properties I used to like. I'm done with CBS All Access' version of The Stand. I probably won't bother watching it, and this is the last time I'll be writing about it (insert audience cheering sounds).

Actually I'm starting to wonder if The Stand will even be released at all. According to the internet, filming's already concluded and they finished post production in March of this year. Just days before the pandemic lockdown began!

Will the public even want to see it now? Who wants to watch a show about 99% of the world being wiped out by a deadly virus, when it's actually happening outside our barricaded doors for real?

On the other hand, there were hundreds of war films produced during WWII, so who the hell knows what the public wants? If I had to guess, I'd say The Stand will eventually air on CBS All Access, but not until well after our world returns to normal.

Another reason the miniseries will likely be delayed— the producers made the decision to cast Amber Heard as Nadine Cross! Heard's currently in a LOT of hot water over her antics regarding her antics with ex-husband Johnny Depp. In fact there's talk that she could possibly be facing jail time! Whether the allegations are true or not, it seems like they cast the right person to play the psychotic and unstable Nadine! M-O-O-N! That spells unfortunate casting decision!

Saturday, April 18, 2020

It Came From The Cineplex: Impractical Jokers: The Movie

I saw this "movie" back in February, a couple weeks before the world ended. I wasn't gonna bother writing about it, but since there's no new content here in our post apocalyptic world, I figured why not? I saw the damn thing, so you're gonna share my pain.

Impractical Jokers: The Movie was "written" by Joe Gatto, James Murray, Brian Quinn, Sal Vulcano and Chris Henchy. It was "directed" by Chris Henchy.

Gatto, Murray, Quinn and Vulcano are the stars of the Impractical Jokers hidden camera TV series, which has run for an astonishing EIGHT seasons, and as near as I can tell is still in production. The quartet formed an improv group called The Tenderloins in 1999, and have been creating content for YouTube and other online media sites ever since. In 2011 they pitched the idea for the Impractical Jokers show to the truTV network (whatever that is), who picked it up.

Henchy wrote various shorts and TV episodes before graduating into film. He previously wrote Land Of The Lost (2009), The Other Guys and The Campaign, which should tell you everything you need to know about his level of talent. Impractical Jokers: The Movie is his directorial debut.

Full disclosure: I am NOT a fan of the Impractical Jokers TV show or its ostensible "stars," so this is gonna be an unavoidably biased review. I watched a couple clips from the series on YouTube several years ago, and was barely able to get through them. I don't much care for the cringeworthy hidden camera pranks featured in the series.


I've also never been able to stand comedians who laugh at their own material. Seeing the Jokers giggling uncontrollably at their own hilarious antics just grated on my nerves.

So why did I bother seeing a movie based on a show I don't like? Believe me, it wasn't my idea. There was f*ck-all playing at the theater that particular weekend, as my Movie-Going Pal and I had already seen everything of interest. I suggested we just not see anything at all and watch a blu ray at my house. Unfortunately he's a HUGE fan of the Impractical Jokers show, and really wanted to see the movie. He assured me that I'd like it once I started watching it. I knew that was a load of crap, but grudgingly agreed to go anyway.

Of course the movie was everything I thought it would be— dull, shockingly unfunny and literally painful to sit through. The movie clocks in at a brisk ninety three minutes, but I swear it felt more like four hours. I honestly wanted to just get up and leave, which is something that hasn't happened since Transformers: Age Of Extinction. I didn't drive though, so I'd have had no way home. I should have called an Uber.

I wasn't kidding when I said the movie wasn't the least bit humorous. I sat through the entire interminable runtime completely stone-faced, without so much as cracking a smile. And it wasn't because I'm not a fan of the show and didn't want to be there. The theater was surprisingly full, and I didn't hear a peep from the rest of the audience either. The silence in that theater was both deafening and telling. If you like your comedies laugh-free, then this is your movie!

At what point can a movie no longer be called a movie? How little content or entertainment value can a film contain before it can't be classified as a film? Impractical Jokers: The Movie definitively answers that question. This isn't a film. It's not even an extended episode of the TV series that somehow made its way into theaters. It's nothing. It's amazing how few of the elements traditionally associated with a movie are contained in this one.

It's a "movie" filled with a tiny handful of segments strung together by the slightest of plots. No, strike that
— it's not even a plot. More like a rough outline.

Fans of the TV show will be disappointed by the paltry few hidden camera pranks. Film buffs will be dissatisfied by the lack of everything else. So who the hell was this movie for?

Somehow this film had a budget of $3 million dollars, despite the fact it looks like it cost a hundred times less. Even more astonishing is that it grossed $10.6 million dollars! And that was BEFORE the viral apocalypse shut down cineplexes nationwide! If the theaters were still open it'd probably have grossed at least $50 million. I honestly don't get it.

I'M NOT EVEN GONNA GIVE A SPOILER WARNING, BECAUSE THERE'S LITERALLY NOTHING TO SPOIL.

The "Plot:"
In 1994, four Staten Island teens
— Brian Quinn, James "Murr" Murray, Sal Vulcano and Joe Gatto (all playing fictionalized versions of themselves)— desperately want to go to the Paula Abdul concert. Unfortunately the show's sold out, so the Jokers (as the four are known) come up with the brilliant plan to don yellow jackets and pose as security personnel to sneak in.

Amazingly their plan works. Unfortunately they become a little too excited and end up ruining the concert. As the real security chases the Jokers out of the arena, Paula Abdul vows to get revenge on them
— even if it takes twenty five years.

Cut to twenty five years later. The guys are now the stars of their own improbably successful TV show, Impractical Jokers. They go out for a meal at Red Lobster, their favorite mid-priced menu restaurant. There they run into Paula Abdul, who's inexplicably dining there as well.

When Abdul sees the Jokers, she calls them over to her table. The guys are afraid she's going to take her revenge on them then and there, but soon realize she recognizes them from TV, not as the jerks who ruined her concert. Whew!

Abdul tells the Jokers she's a huge fan of their show (I guess there's no accounting for taste) and invites them to a big bash she's throwing in Miami. She tells her assistant to give them tickets to the party, then sashays out of the restaurant.

The guys are ecstatic until they notice she only gave them three tickets, meaning one of them won't be able to go. Oh, the humanity!

Instead of simply contacting Abdul and explaining the oversight like normal humans, the guys decide to have a contest. They take a road trip to Miami, and along the way they compete in a contest to see who'll be left out of the party.

And that's the so-called "plot!" No, really! The rest of the movie consists of a handful of unfunny hidden camera gags, as each Joker tries to get the others to lose. At one point Joe, Sal and Murr want to quit and go home to their families. In a bizarre attempt to give the movie some "heart," Brian tells them they have to finish what they started, and they continue to Florida.

After one last challenge, Murr ends up being the loser and has to stay in a hotel while the other three Jokers go to Paula Abdul's party. The other Jokers begin missing Murr, realizing it's not right that they should have a good time while he's alone. Just as they decide to go get him, Murr shows up at the party, having sneaked in by wearing a yellow security jacket.

Abdul sees Murr's yellow jacket and suddenly recognizes the Jokers as the ones who ruined her concert twenty five years ago. All hell then breaks loose, and she and her bodyguards attack the Jokers.

Suddenly Joe gets onstage and begins singing one of Abdul's songs. She sees the crowd getting into it, and inexplicably decides to drop the matter and join in.

The next day the guys sit on the beach, reminiscing about the party. Murr says Paula Abdul gave him tickets to fly back home on her private plane (?). Unfortunately she only gave him three. Cut to Brian, Sal and Joe flying home in style, while Murr is strapped to the wing of a biplane. Ha, I guess?


By the way, it occurs to me that this synopsis not only makes it seem like there's a plot, but that it's actually somewhat interesting. I apologize for the confusion.

Thoughts:
• Honestly there's not much to say about this movie, so anyone hoping to see me spend 50,000 words ripping it a new asshole may be disappointed.

• Back in the 2000s, 
Johnny Knoxville and his pals had great success with the Jackass movie franchise. In fact the first movie in the series grossed nearly $80 million on its $5 million budget. Knoxville simply replicated the format of the hit TV show on the big screen, but took advantage of the movie's bigger budget to stage more elaborate stunts and used the lack of censorship to make them even raunchier.

One would think the Impractical Jokers would have followed this proven formula and created a theatrical version of their show— one that was bigger and better than the TV series. Nope! In fact, for a movie called Impractical Jokers, there's very little impractical joking in it. Instead of concentrating on their trademark hidden camera pranks, the guys seem much more invested in the threadbare plot. 

 The few pranks included in the film are oddly lifeless, laugh-free and go absolutely nowhere. In one, the guys lock Murr in a room with a live tiger. Oh, my sides! In another, they ditch Brian and force him to dress in a suit of armor and ride a horse to their motel. Hilarious!

Even the handful of pranks involving unsuspecting members of the public are misfires. Their marks look more puzzled than outraged by the Jokers' behavior. 

Maybe after eight seasons they've simply run out of ideas for stunts? There's a solution for that, guys— it's called "hiring actual writers!"

 The movie begins with a flashback to 1994, when the Jokers were seventeen. Rather than cast actual teens here, the guys— who are all now in their early forties— play their younger selves. It works about as well as you'd expect.

Of course finding four seventeen year olds who looked like the guys would have taken a lot of effort— something this film avoids at all costs.

I assume the fact that these middle aged guys play teenagers at the beginning of the film was meant as a joke. In fact when Brian first appears in a horribly unconvincing wig, he turns to the camera and says, "Just go with it!" Such is the humor in this movie. 

 I should know better than to expect logic in a "film" like this, but here goes. Late in the third act, the guys are ready to drive back to Staten Island. Murr says there's no need, as Paula Abdul gifted them with tickets on her private jet.

Wait, what? So Abdul owns her own private jet, but you need tickets to fly on it? Even worse, she only gave them three tickets, so one of the Jokers can't fly back home. So instead of all four of them simply boarding, one has to stay behind because he doesn't have a "ticket" to a celebrity's private jet. That... that doesn't make any goddamned sense.

 In the final shot of the movie, Murr flies back to New York on top of a red biplane.

Amazingly this wasn't a CGI effect. James Murray really did agree to be strapped to the top of an airplane. Supposedly he took out a life insurance policy beforehand, in case anything went wrong. 

Jesus Christ, Murr... it's your business if you want to risk your life, but not for this movie!

Impractical Jokers: The Movie is a desperately unfunny and painful ninety three minutes of lackluster gags and a threadbare outline that can't even properly be called a film. Even if I was a die hard fan of the TV series I'd be disappointed with this lackluster version, and wouldn't be able to give it more than a middling C. As someone who's not a fan of the Jokers, I'm giving it a well-deserved D+.

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

Life Imitates Art Yet Again!

Last week, due to our country's interminable coronavirus lockdown, WKBN newscaster Dan Martin was broadcasting from a makeshift studio in his home. Unbeknownst to him though, his cat Duke decided to photobomb his report in the most brazen and provocative way possible. Whoops!

Swap out the cat for a dog, and Martin's broadcast is a dead ringer for a scene in Old Wounds, the first ever episode of The Orville. In the pilot, Captain Mercer receives a call from Professor Aronov, whose pet beagle enthusiastically licks its privates in the background.

More proof that our world is rapidly unraveling at the seams.

The Mandalorian Season 1, Chapter Eight: Redemption

I just noticed that I wrote this review months ago, but for some reason never posted it. Time to correct that ASAP!

It's the Season 1 finale of The Mandalorian!

So far it's been a pretty damned good show, and I've eagerly looked forward to each episode. Believe me, no one's more surprised than I am to hear me say that!

I was a huge Star Wars fan ever since I saw the original film back in high school. It's not an exaggeration to say that the Original Trilogy had a major influence on my life, going so far as to influence my choice of career (if you can call it that). 

Unfortunately the disappointingly bland Prequels dealt my love for the franchise a near-fatal blow, placing it on life support. Sadly, Disney's execrable and incompetent Sequel Trilogy killed it for good. Star Wars is officially dead to me now.

Which is why I scoffed when Disney announced they were producing a new TV series called The Mandalorian. Based on their recent track record, there was no way it could possibly be any good, and I had absolutely ZERO expectations for the series. I expected it to be another nail in the Star Wars coffin.

So imagine my surprise and delight when I watched the first episode and it was actually... not bad! In fact I enjoyed it quite a bit. Wow, a Star Wars project from Disney that's actually good and doesn't make me want to kill myself. What a concept!

Much of the credit has to go to actor-director-producer-writer Jon Favreau. He's directed many successful films, such as Elf, Zathura: A Space Adventure, Iron Man and Iron Man 2 as well as the live action versions of The Jungle Book and The Lion King

Favreau created The Mandalorian and is the head writer as well as showrunner. So it's pretty much all his vision we're seeing on the screen here. Obviously he has a love for and understanding of Star Wars that JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson can only dream of.

Kudos as well to executive producer Dave Filoni, who also developed The Clone Wars animated series. I've often said that show was ten times better than anything in the Prequels, so bringing in Filoni was a plus.

I think what I like most about the series is its utter simplicity. There are no galactic conflicts to be found here. No Rebels fighting Empires, or armies of Jedi clashing with Sith. Just a simple bounty hunter trying to make a living, who makes the fateful decision to save a baby.

I've enjoyed the extensive world building as well, as we get a closer look at the Mandalorians and what makes their culture tick.

It also doesn't hurt that the series is incredibly cinematic, and looks as good or better than any of the multimillion dollar movies in the franchise. Disney must be throwing a crap ton of cash at this project. Of course the fact that the season's only eight episodes long probably helps. Fewer eps means they can spend more money on each one.

So far I've been impressed by the quality of the episodes in this first season. Some have been better than others of course, but none of them were outright terrible. They've all been far better than I ever imagined they'd be.

That said, this season finale contains a couple of MAJOR missteps, one of which comes very close to destroying the entire premise of the show (more on these below). These flubs didn't kill my enjoyment of the series as a whole, but they definitely lessened it somewhat.

And that's what worries me about the future of the show. As I said, so far it's been better than it had any right to be, mostly because they kept it simple. Now that it's exploded in popularity and Baby Yoda has become a mainstream phenomenon, I have a feeling they're gonna muck it up. It wouldn't surprise me if in Season 2 they start pouring on the fan service and bringing in characters from the movies and animated series. I just KNOW that at some point they're gonna bring goddamned Boba Fett in for a cameo. It's inevitable at this point.

I hope that doesn't happen, but this is Disney we're talking about. It's a given that they'll find a way to screw it up.

SPOILERS!

The Plot:
Picking up where we left off last week, two Scout Troopers have killed Kuiil and captured Baby Yoda. They race back to the Nevarro settlement, where Moff Gideon has just arrived. For no good reason though, they stop just outside of town and radio their commander, telling him they have the Asset. He tells them to stay put, as Gideon just killed a squad of The Client's Stormtroopers for looking at him funny.

The Scout Troopers then wait and begin making cringeworthy, awkward small talk. Baby Yoda tries to escape from his satchel, but Trooper One hits him in the head and tells him to quit moving. The two then shoot at a nearby piece of trash as target practice, but neither can hit it (Com-O-Dee!). Trooper Two asks to see the baby, but Trooper One says he's not taking it out of the satchel until they deliver it.

Just then IG-11 walks up and identifies himself as Baby Yoda's nurse droid, and insists the Troopers hand him over. They fire at him, so IG-11 easily incapacitates them both. He retrieves the child and apologizes for the violence he had to witness.

Back at the Nevarro Cantina, Manny, Cara Dune and Greef Karga are still pinned down by Moff Gideon and his forces. The Stormtroopers bring out an E-web heavy blaster and begin setting it up. Dune says it's all over, as the weapon will decimate the Cantina.

Manny scans the interior and finds a sewer vent, and says they can use it to escape to his Mandalorian Covert. Dune uses her blaster on the vent, but can't break through it for plot reasons. Gideon hears them trying to escape addresses them all by name and reveals he knows their complete backstories. Dune is a survivor of Alderaan who became a Rebel Shock Trooper. Karga's a disgraced Magistrate who got involved with the Bounty Hunter Guild. And Manny, whose real name is Din Djarin, lived through the Siege Of Mandalore.

After this history lesson, Gideon urges them to lay down their arms and surrender. For absolutely no good reason, he gives them till nightfall to decide. Naturally Manny & Co. don't trust Gideon. Dune is surprised to see him alive, as he was reportedly executed for war crimes. Manny's shaken by the fact that Gideon knows his true name— which hasn't been spoken since he was a child.

Manny then has another flashback, in which his parents hide him in a bunker during a Separatist attack on his city. Seconds later they were both killed by Super Battle Droids. Suddenly one opened his bunker and prepared to kill him as well. Just then the droid's blasted to bits, and a Mandalorian appears and holds out his hand. Young Manny takes it, and the Mandalorian activates his jetpack and they fly away to safety. Young Manny looks down as other Mandalorians wipe out the droids.

Manny explains that as a foundling, he was taken in by the Mandalorians and swore his life to their creed when he came of age which we all figured out long ago). He says the only record of his real name was in the registers on Mandalore. Gideon was an Imperial Security Officer during the Great Purge of Mandalore, so that's likely how he knows his true name.

Manny tries calling Kuiil again. IG-11 answers and reports his master is dead. He says he has Baby Yoda and is  currently protecting him. Apparently his idea of protecting the baby is to put it on his back, then ride his speeder bike into town as he guns down dozens of Stormtroopers with pinpoint accuracy.

IG jumps off the speeder bike, and it crashes into a swarm of Troopers in front of the Cantina. Manny and Karga run outside to help. IG's hit and brought to his knees. 
Manny then picks up the E-web blaster and begins firing on the Troopers.

A Death Trooper plants a detonator on the Cantina door and blows it open. Several of them enter the Cantina, but Dune manages to mow them down. Moff Gideon suddenly returns for some reason, and fires at Manny, shooting him in the head. Luckily his Beskar armor protects him, but he's still dazed.

Gideon then sees the E-web power pack next to Manny, and shoots it. The pack violently explodes, severely injuring Manny. Dune and Greef drag him back into the Cantina, and IG follows. 

Karga shows IG the sewer grate, and he uses a welding torch to cut through it. Dune tries to treat Manny's injuries, and says she needs to remove his helmet to save him. He refuses to take it off, and tells her to protect Baby Yoda. He hands her his Mythosaur necklace and tells her to give it to the child, so everyone will know it's under Mandalorian protection.

Suddenly a red striped Stormtrooper enters the Cantina with a flamethrower, and begins torching the interior. Manny tells the others he'll hold him off while they escape. 

Before anyone can react, the Flametrooper shoots a fiery blast directly at them all. Baby Yoda then raises his tiny hand and deflects the flame with the Force. The flame engulfs the Trooper, killing him. 

IG gets the grate open, and Dune and Karga take Baby Yoda into the sewer. Dune makes IG-11 promise to save Manny and bring him along.

The droid then examines Manny and says he'll die without immediate treatment. Manny asks the droid to kill him, but IG says it can't, as it's been reprogrammed to be a nurse. It says it needs to remove Manny's helmet in order to save him. Manny refuses, saying he can never show his face to any living being. IG points out that he's not alive, and gently removes Manny's helmet. He administers a bacta spray and replaces the helmet, saving Manny's life.

IG-11 helps Manny into the sewer, where they join the others. Manny says they can follow it to the Mandalorian Covert, where they'll find reinforcements. Unfortunately when they arrive at the Covert they find a large pile of Mandalorian helmets and armor— indicating the Covert's been wiped out. 

The Armorer appears and explains that after Manny took the child and left Nevarro, the Imperials arrived. The Mandalorians knew they'd be slaughtered, so they "revealed themselves" and fled the Covert. She says a few may have escaped offworld.

Manny asks the Armorer to come with them, but she refuses to leave until she's salvaged the discarded Beskar. The Armorer takes Manny to her forge, and asks to see the "asset" that's caused so much trouble. He shows her Baby Yoda, and she says he looks helpless. Manny says the baby saved him from a Mudhorn, as it can move objects with its mind.

The Armorer says she's heard stories about such "wizards," and tells him about the battle between Mandalore The Great and the Jedi. She says the baby's species were enemies, but this individual is not. She says as a foundling, it's up to Manny to return it to its own kind. Why she suggests this instead of telling him to raise it as his own is unclear.

The Armorer then forges a Mudhorn signet for Manny and attaches it to his right pauldron. She says he and Baby Yoda are now a clan of two. She then gives him a "Rising Phoenix," aka a jetpack. She tells him he'll need extensive training before using it.

Just then there's an explosion in the distance, and the Armorer tells them she'll hold off the Stormtroopers while they escape. Manny and the others flee into the tunnels. She then kneels, waiting for the Imperials to arrive. Several Stormtroopers enter her forge, and demand to know where the others went. Instantly the Armorer springs into action, attacking the Troopers with her foundry tools. She smashes through their helmets and armor, easily killing them all.

Manny and the others race through the sewers, eventually making it to a lava river. They find a fortified ferry and pile in. A seemingly inert R2 droid comes to life and starts rowing the boat downstream. They spot the end of the tunnel ahead, and Karga says they're in the clear. Unfortunately Manny scans the exit and says there are a dozen or more Stormtroopers waiting on either side. Dune tell the droid to stop, but it ignores her, prompting her to shoot its head off.

They quickly run through their options, and Manny suggests trying to shoot their way out. IG-11 analyzes the situation and suggests he initiate self-destruct. Manny, who at long last has learned to trust the droid, says there's got to be another way. IG says there's no scenario in which both he and Baby Yoda can survive.

IG gives Baby Yoda to Manny and tells him to look after him. Manny says they need him, but IG points out again that he's not a living thing, and is simply fulfilling his purpose as a machine. IG then steps into the lava river and slowly heads toward the exit. He wades out of the tunnel and the Stormtroopers begin firing on him. He states he can't allow himself to be captured and self-destructs, killing all the Troopers.

Manny and the others then sail out of the tunnel. They make it to shore and begin crossing the lava plains. Suddenly Moff Gideon flies overhead in his TIE Fighter, and begins firing at them. Karga asks Baby Yoda to use the Force on Gideon, but he doesn't understand. Manny dons his new jetpack and awkwardly flies up to attack Gideon.

Manny uses his grappling hook to latch onto the TIE. He tries shooting into the cockpit, but it's apparently blaster-proof. He attempts to attach a detonator to the hatch, but Gideon spins the ship, causing Manny to drop it. Finally he plants a second detonator on the wing and jumps off. The detonator explodes and severs the wing, and the TIE Fighter spins out of control. It crashes behind a ridge.

Manny lands on the ground, where he rejoins the others. Karga says he's going to stick around town and make sure no more Stormtroopers show up. Dune inexplicably decides to stay as well and help him. Karga tells Manny he's welcome back in the Bounty Hunting Guild. Manny declines, saying he has a mission to return Baby Yoda to his people.

The two return to the Razor Crest. Manny buries the body of Kuiil. Baby Yoda plays with the Mythosaur necklace, and Manny lets him keep it. They blast off and head into space.

In the epilogue, a group of Jawas scavenge the wreckage of Gideon's crashed TIE Fighter. Suddenly a mysterious black blade cuts through the hull, scattering the Jawas. To absolutely no one's surprise, Moff Gideon crawls out of the wreckage. He surveys the scene as he holds the Darksaber— an ancient Mandalorian relic— in his hand

Thoughts: 
Redemption begins with the first of two MAJOR missteps, which come very close to torpedoing the whole episode. 

The story inexplicably begins with a thirty five minute sequence involving two Scout Troopers, in a sci-fi remake of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. OK, so maybe this scene didn't last thirty five minutes, but it sure felt like it.

For some unfathomable reason, the internet at large is absolutely in love with these two characters. Apparently every word out of their mouths was pure gold, and the public just can't get enough of them. Fans are even demanding they get their own show! Jesus Christ!

This is likely to be an unpopular opinion, but I HATED this scene. No wait, that's not right. I LOATHED it, with the white hot passion of a thousand exploding suns.

Worst of all was the switchback, inappropriate tone. Our heroes are at their lowest point in the story right now. Fan-favorite character Kuiil has just been callously murdered by these two Scout Troopers, and internet sensation Baby Yoda has been captured by them. Even worse, they begin physically abusing him when he misbehaves. 

And then we get fifteen interminable minutes of their alleged "comedic" banter, as the audience yuks at their every word and laps it up with an industrial-sized ladle. 

Besides not being funny, their conversation obviously wasn't scripted, and reeks of ad-libbing. It reminds me for all the world of the execrable Ghostbusters 2016, in which the cast was shoved on set and told to "say something funny" for two miserable hours. 

Ha, I guess?

And before someone tries to school me about the scene, I understand they were trying to show that being a soldier in ANY galaxy isn't all fighting and glory. They spend most of their time sitting around waiting, or following dull, seemingly nonsensical orders. I get it. But that doesn't justify the painful attempts at comedy or the shockingly inappropriate and abrupt change in tone.

As I've said, I was pleasantly surprised by this series and amazed at how well it turned out. Which is why this major miscalculation is so puzzling. How the hell did Jon Favreau think this was a good idea?

• As if that wasn't bad enough, we then get an "hilarious" scene in which the two Scout Troopers try to shoot at a piece of trash twenty feet away from them— and miss spectacularly every time.

Jesus wept.

This isn't the first time the "Stormtroopers Are All Bad Shots" joke has popped up in the series. They did it a couple weeks back in The Prisoner, and I didn't like it then either.

OK, one more time
— I get that it's a running joke among fandom that Stormtroopers are all terrible shots. But that's a just a conceit of the storytelling, designed to give the heroes a fighting chance against insurmountable odds. Stormtroopers having bad aim SHOULD NOT be a thing within the universe of the show! Ordinary citizens are supposed to be terrified of them, not giggling behind their backs!


• One last dig at this scene before I stop ragging on it. I don't understand why the two Scout Troopers stopped outside of town, rather than delivering the baby directly to Moff Gideon. That's the entire reason he's on this planet in the first place— to get the kid. So why the delay?

Manny & Co. even realize that Gideon hasn't killed them yet because he thinks they have the baby. But he DOES have it he just doesn't know it yet because he won't let his troopers back in town for some insane reason.

OK, enough kvetching!

• I love this scene of IG-11 stepping into the frame as he confronts the two Troopers. They've used this exact same shot in virtually every Western ever made. The only thing missing were jangling spurs on IG's feet!

I gotta admit, I cheered a bit when IG-11 rescued Baby Yoda and permanently silenced the two annoying-ass Scout Troopers.

• Back in town, Moff Gideon's men set up an E-Web Heavy Repeating Blaster outside the Cantina where Manny & Co. are hiding.

We've seen the E-Web before, most notably in The Empire Strikes Back, where a Snowtrooper set one up inside Echo Base on Hoth.


Once the E-Web is set up, Gideon yells to Manny: "If you are unfamiliar with this weapon, I am sure that Republican Shock Trooper Carasynthia Dune of Alderaan will advise you that she has witnessed many of her ranks vaporized mid-descent facing the predecessor of this particular model." 


So it's not just a gun that fires large explosive rounds. It's an energy weapon that disintegrates its targerts.


A bit later Manny grabs the E-Web and starts mowing down Stormtroopers with it. Oddly enough they all just fall over. No vaporization!


• This week we finally get to see Manny's complete origin. We've seen brief flashes of his genesis all season, but this is the first time we've seen the whole story in sequence. 

Among the things we learn from this flashback: Manny's village was attacked by Super Battle Droids (Jesus, George, is that really the best name you could come up with for these things?), who also killed his parents. This explains his deep-seated hatred of droids as an adult.

We also get to see how he became a Mandalorian. Just as he's about to be killed by one of the droids, he's rescued by a Mandalorian trooper and taken into the clan as a foundling. Which of course explains his overt interest and concern for the foundlings in his local Covert.

• The glowing blue fish booze (first seen in Sanctuary) makes another appearance here. Wow, that stuff's so popular they're exporting it to other planets! Given the apparent demand for it, why aren't the krill farmers on Sorgan all millionaires?

• At one point we see a couple Stormtroopers bartering with a Jawa— on Nevarro!

Ever since Star Wars premiered way back in 1977, I've always assumed that Jawas were native to Tatooine. Maybe even an offshoot race of the Tusken Raiders.


Welp, now I'm not so sure, as it's starting to look like they may not be from Tatooine after all. A few episodes back we saw a clan of them on Arvala-7, home of Manny's Ugnaught pal Kuiil. And now in this episode there's at least one on Nevarro. 


So what gives? Did they originate on Tatooine and recently decide to venture out onto other worlds? Or do they come from a different planet altogether, and are just galactic nomads who can be found everywhere? It's impossible to tell for sure at this point. Wookieepedia says they're definitely native to Tatooine, but I'm not sure if anything it says is considered canon or not.


• One of my favorite scenes in the episode was when IG-11 roared into town on his stolen speeder bike, mowing down dozens of Stormtroopers. I love how there's no real "front" to IG, and he just spins around and reconfigures his body and limbs to suit the situation.

• There's some strangeness going on in the Cantina courtyard scenes. At the end of the previous episode, Moff Gideon lands his TIE Fighter in the courtyard, exits and marches up to the Cantina. 

In this episode he gives Manny & Co. an ultimatum, then spins on his heel and struts back toward his TIE.


A few seconds later IG-11 crashes his speeder bike into the courtyard, taking out a slew of Stormtroopers. Apparently Gideon must have climbed back into his TIE and flew off right before this happened, as the ship is now nowhere to be seen. Oddly enough we never see or even hear his ship take off. Whoops!

A battle then breaks out in the courtyard between Manny & Co. and the remaining Stormtroopers. Suddenly Gideon enters the courtyard again for some reason, having returned from... somewhere.

So let's see if I've got it straight... he lands his ship in the courtyard, gets out, threatens Manny, gets back in the ship, flies off, parks it a few blocks away, gets out again, then walks back to the courtyard, where a chaotic battle is happening. Got it.


• Gideon walks up to the Cantina and calls Manny, Dune and Karga by name, mentioning specific details about each and giving them an ultimatum. When he gets to Manny he says, "Or perhaps the decommissioned Mandalorian hunter, Din Djarin, has heard the songs of the Siege of Mandalore, when gunships outfitted with similar ordnance laid waste to fields of Mandalorian recruits in The Night of a Thousand Tears." Several things here.

First of all, Manny's real name is apparently Din Djarin. I wonder if that was the moniker he was born with, or if the Mandalorians gave him a "clan name?"


Secondly, the "Night Of A Thousand Tears" is from The Clone Wars animated series. It's a reference to the Siege Of Mandalore, in which the planet was attacked by the Jedi after Darth Maul took it over.

• This week we get yet another Stormtrooper variation: The Flametrooper!

Apparently Flametroopers aren't new, as they appeared in both The Clone Wars series and the Star Wars Battlefront videogame. This is the first time we've seen one in live action though.

• In this episode we find out that Mandalorians are a creed, not a race. So they're kinda like Space Jews then!

Based on this nugget of info, along with the fact that Mandalorians regularly replenish their numbers with foundlings, does that mean ANY being can become a Mandalorian? Could a Wookiee put on a helmet and become a Mandalorian? Or do they only accept humans?

• And now it's time to talk about the other problematic (to me at least) scene in this episode— Manny's unmasking.


During his battle with Gideon's forces, Manny's mortally wounded. IG examines him and says he'll die without treatment. He tells Manny he needs to remove his helmet in order to fix him up. Manny refuses, saying that as a Mandalorian, "no living thing can ever see his face."

IG helpfully points out that he's not a living thing (shades of The Return Of The King's "I am no man" line), and unceremoniously pulls Manny's helmet off. We're then treated to a good look at his pasty white face and perpetually sweaty hair.

This was a HUGE miscalculation on the part of the producers. In fact I can't type the word "HUGE" large enough here. In virtually every episode so far we're told that Mandalorians never, ever, EVER remove their helmets in public or reveal their true faces. Never. Ever.

So what happens in this episode? Manny's helmet is removed and he reveals his true face!

Are you freakin' kidding me? What the hell was Jon Favreau thinking here?

A big part of Manny's appeal is his mystique. We really don't know much about him. We don't need to know much about him! In fact the more we learn about his past and what makes him tick, the less interesting he becomes.

Even though we all know he's human and he's played by Pedro Pascal, it was still a mystery as to just what was underneath his helmet. Was he handsome? Plain looking? Was his face horribly scarred? 

Nope, none of those things. He's just a guy! That's it. Any sense of mystery the character may have once had is now completely gone, evaporated in an instant.

And the thing is, I KNEW this was going to happen. I knew there was no way in hell that Disney would be content to pump out a series in which the hero never shows his face.

This was a major misstep by an otherwise nearly perfect show. It's not enough to make me stop watching, but I definitely like it a little less than I did.

• Manny & Co. head for the Covert under the city. Unfortunately when they arrive, they find a large pile of Mandalorian helmets and armor.

I've watched this scene a dozen times, and I'm still confused by it. The first time I saw it I thought the Imperials had slaughtered the Mandalorians and displayed the armor to send a message.

But in rewatching, I don't think that's what happened. Here's the conversation between the Armorer and Manny:

The Armorer: "It was not his fault. We revealed ourselves. We knew what could happen if we left the covert. The Imperials arrived shortly thereafter. This is what resulted."
Manny: "Did any survive?"
The Armorer: "I hope so. Some may have escaped offworld."

Based on the Armorer's words, it seems like the Mandalorians knew they'd be killed on sight, so they willingly removed their helmets and armor. They then waltzed unrecognized right past the Imperials.

Hmm... I dunno. Doesn't removing their armor and sneaking around seem awfully... Un-Mandalorian? As we just saw earlier in this episode, Manny was willing to die rather than take off his precious helmet. Their entire society is built around hiding their faces, for corn's sake! Seems unlikely to me that the whole Covert would agree to expose themselves to blend in with the locals. I'd be like a group of religious zealots renouncing God. 

Even more unlikely is the idea that they'd take off their helmets so they could sneak past the Imperials. Mandalorians are supposed to be the most feared and badass warriors in the galaxy. Heck, the Armorer took out an entire squad of Stormtroopers by herself, with nothing but a hammer and a pair of tongs!

There's no way in hell they wouldn't have fought back if the Imperials attacked them!

• Ever since we first met the Armorer, she's seemed inordinately concerned by Manny's lack of a signet. Apparently this bothered her so much that this week she takes it upon herself to come up with one for him a Mudhorn. She then forges the signet and spot-welds it to his armor.

• When the Armorer sees Baby Yoda, she and Manny have the following conversation:

The Armorer: "It is a foundling. By dreed, it is in your care."

Manny: "You wish me to train this thing?"
The Armorer: "It is too weak. It would die. You have no choice. You must reunite it with its own kind."
Manny: "Where?"
The Armorer: "This, you must determine."
Manny: "You expect me to search the galaxy for the home of this creature and deliver it to a race of enemy sorcerers?"
The Armorer: "This is the Way."

Wait a minute... I thought taking in foundlings and making them part of their clan was the Mandalorian way? So why all of a sudden does she want him to find out where this particular foundling belongs? Doesn't that go against everything the Mandalorians stand for?


Why, it's almost like they needed to set up a new story arc for Season 2, and this "Search For Baby Yoda's Kind" was all they could think of.


• Back in The Child, Baby Yoda used the Force for the first time to save Manny from the Mudhorn. Both Manny and Kuiil were amazed by this, as they'd never heard of such powers.


At the time I said I liked the idea. It's a big galaxy after all, so it's perfectly natural that there'd be remote areas where people never heard of the Jedi or the Force.


Unfortunately this episode made me change my mind. It doesn't make much sense that Manny wouldn't have at least a rudimentary knowledge of the Jedi. 


When Manny meets with the Armorer, he tells her that Baby Yoda is from an unknown species that can move objects with their minds. She says, "I know of such things. The songs of eons past tell of battles between Mandalore The Great, and an order of sorcerers called Jedi that fought with such powers."


Mandalore The Great is presumably one of the most important figures in all of Mandalorian history. He's literally the equivalent of George Washington, Abe Lincoln and General Patton rolled into one. It seems unlikely that Manny wouldn't have been taught about his exploits and achievements in foundling school. 


And since Mandalore The Great spent his life battling the Jedi... it doesn't make much sense that Manny would be completely ignorant of them.


Much of Mandalorian history was established in The Clone Wars series. Unfortunately The Mandalorian seems to be ignoring most of that lore. It's cherry picking choice bits to incorporate into its plot and tossing out the rest. Which of course results in major continuity gaffes like this one.


• As a parting gift, the Armorer gives Manny a Rising Phoenix, aka a jetpack— much like the one Boba Fett wore. She then ominously tells him, "When you have healed, you will begin your drills. Until you know it, it will not listen to your commands."

Her comment makes it sound like the jetpack is somehow controlled by the user's thoughts, which would come in handy if you had a blaster in each hand as you flew.


At the end of the episode, Manny puts on his jetpack and takes off after Gideon's TIE Fighter. He flies a bit awkwardly for the first few seconds, but quickly gets the hang of it, touching down gently and blasting off with ease.


Apparently it didn't take long for the Rising Phoenix to start listening to his commands! The way the Armorer talked, I thought he'd have to train with the thing for months. Instead he became a pro after thirty seconds!


• One of the best parts of the episode was the awesome battle between the squad of Stormtroopers and the Armorer who murderizes them all with nothing but her blacksmith tools!

It was a brutal reminder that Mandalorians are a warrior race sorry, creed and not to be messed with.

• Manny and the others make their way through the tunnels, and eventually encounter a slowly moving river of molten rock. Karga pipes up and says, "This is the lava river."

Yeah, no sh*t, Greef! Why the hell is that laughably obvious line in there? Was it supposed to be a joke that just didn't land?


• I couldn't help but laugh when I saw this shot of Dune holding Baby Yoda while blasting the barge away from the hardened lava.

It reminded me for all the world of the Scorcher trailer (starring Tugg Speedman) from Tropic Thunder!

• Once the group hops into the barge, they see it's manned by a seemingly inert R2 unit. Suddenly the droid activates and stands upright revealing it has spindly arms and legs. 

I'm not quite sure how I feel about this! Somehow it seems wrong to see a humanoid R2 unit!

• IG-11 wades through the lava river in order to wipe out the waiting Stormtroopers and save Manny and the others. Hmm... the temperature of molten lava ranges from 1,300° F to 2,200° F. I dunno what IG's made of, but apparently it's pretty tough stuff!

• For some reason, this shot of Cara Dune was flopped. You can clearly see here that her Rebel tattoo is under her right eye instead of her left, and the part in her hair's changed sides as well. The bandage covering her arm tattoo is on the wrong side too.

I assume once they started editing the episode they realized they needed a shot of her facing the right side of the screen. Apparently they only filmed her facing left, so they flopped the image and hoped we wouldn't notice in all the excitement.


CUTENESS OVERLOAD: As soon as Manny & Co. escape from the sewers, Gideon appears in his TIE Fighter and attacks. Karga gestures to Baby Yoda, urging him to use the Force against the TIE by saying, "Come on Baby! Do the magic hand thing!"

Of course Baby Yoda doesn't understand, and innocently waves back at him. SQUEEEEEE!!!

• By the way, I'd like to give a shoutout to Carl Weathers while we're talking about him. I think a lot of people (like myself) tend to dismiss his talent and think of him as a musclebound oaf, based on his appearances in the Rocky franchise.


Nothing could be further from the truth! He's actually quite a good actor. I dunno why he never became a bigger star than he did. He could have easily had a career like Stallone or Schwarzenegger.


• I loved the aerial battle between Manny and Gideon in his TIE Fighter. And it was such a simple scene! No epic scenes featuring thousands of Imperial fighters attacking the Rebel forces in a confusing mess of crisscrossing laser beams. Just a guy trying to stop one little fighter. That's it!

Honestly, I was far more invested in this scene than any of the overdone space battles in The Rise Of Skywalker.

• Once Gideon's seemingly killed, Manny asks Karga and Dune what they plan to do next. 
Dune: "I think we cleaned up the town. I'm thinking of staying around just to be sure."
Manny: "You're staying here?"
Karga: "Well, why not? Nevarro is a very fine planet. And now that the scum and villainy have been washed away, it's very respectable again."

As all good Star Wars fans will instantly recognize, Karga's "scum and villainy" line is A New Hope reference— uttered by Obi-Wan right before he and Luke entered Mos Eisley.

• At the end of the episode, Manny scoops up Baby Yoda, activates his jetpack and they fly off toward the Razor Crest.

This is a nice little parallel to the earlier scene in which a Mandalorian picks up Young Manny, flies off with him and makes him part of his clan.

• In the tag scene, we see that to absolutely no one's surprise, Gideon survived the crash of his TIE Fighter.

He then cuts his way out of the ruined cockpit with what appears to be a lightsaber. But not just any lightsaber, mind you. This is the Darksaber, and features a black blade surrounded by a glowing white aura.

The Darksaber played a huge part in The Clone Wars series, and I could easily write 50,000 words on its history and heritage. No one wants that, so I'll do my best to condense.


The Darksaber was built by Tarre Vizsla, who lived about a thousand years before the events of A New Hope, and was the first ever Mandalorian to become a Jedi. I'm assuming it must have been difficult to make, since there appears to be just the one. Its rarity no doubt made it even more valuable.


After Vizsla's death, the Darksaber was kept in a Jedi Temple. Eventually it was stolen by someone from House Vizsla and handed down from one generation to the next.


During the Clone Wars the Darksaber was used by Pre Vizsla, a member of a group called the Death Watch.


Obviously at some point between the Clone Wars and this series, Gideon somehow acquired the Darksaber. I'm sure we'll find out how sometime in Season 2.


I can't say I'm a fan of the look of the Darksaber. It's got a black blade, which I get, but then it's surrounded by a bright white glow! That... that doesn't make any sense. Why would a blade of black energy generate a white glow? Shouldn't there be a black or really dark gray glow around the core?


Even worse, when viewed from a distance as in this shot, it looks for all the world like a regular old lightsaber! Feh.

And so ends Season 1 of The Mandalorian. As I said in the intro, it was far better than I thought it would be— likely because I had ZERO expectations for it. Now let's all just hope that Disney's smart enough to leave Jon Favreau alone and not screw up Season 2. I wouldn't count on that though...
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