Thursday, April 9, 2015

Bronto Soar!

The Brontosaurus is back! Huzzah!

This week a new scientific study has revealed that the Brontosaurus, retconned into oblivion years ago, really is a distinct species.

Here's the long and twisted story— way back in 1874, paleontologist O.C. Marsh discovered one of the most complete dinosaur fossils ever, and hurriedly announced he'd discovered a new species, which he dubbed Brontosaurus (which means "thunder-lizard").

Why was he in such a rush to announce his discovery? Because believe it or not, back then discovering new dinosaurs was a huge deal that led to fame and fortune. This just goes to prove that there've always been people who are famous just for being famous.

In 1903, scientists determined that Marsh's Brontosaurus was really just another example of an Apatosaurus, a dinosaur that had already been discovered decades before. Astonishingly, news of this didn't reach the general public's ears until 1974. And you say we don't need more funding for science in schools!

But now it turns out that Marsh was right after all, and the Brontosaurus has been rescued from Limbo. The Flintstones is looking more and more like a documentary every day!

Now we just need to get rid of the cockamamie idea that dinosaurs were covered in feathers like big chickens, and reinstate Pluto as a planet.

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