Sunday, June 16, 2019

What Happened To The Art Of Movie Poster Design: Wonder Woman 1984

Sigh... Another day, another putrid movie poster. What the hell's going on over there in Hollywood's various design departments? Seems like there's been a veritable plague of god-awful designs in the past month or two. Case in point: This poster for the upcoming Wonder Woman 1984

In this sequel, Wonder Woman teams up with Winston Smith to overthrow the totalitarian regime of the Party, lead by none other than Big Brother himself. It's possible I may have misread the film's synopsis.

Nevertheless, look at this eye-searing abomination of a poster. Jesus Tapdancing Christ! Could they have shoehorned any more colors into the feckin' thing? I assume the mylar curtains are supposed to represent two Ws over and over, but my god... surely there was a less obnoxious way to go about it.

I assume since this movie's set in 1984, the "designer" is trying to evoke the look and spirit of that decade. Thing is, I lived through the 80s, and I don't remember ever seeing anything that looked even remotely like this.

I'll give it credit where it's due— it'll definitely stand out in the cineplex lobby, and draw everyone's eye. Of course once they see it, they'll immediately begin vomiting, but that's to be expected.

A quick check around the internet reveals that the vast majority of fans actually like this appalling advertisement! Holy crap! I was gobsmacked to learn this. What the hell is wrong with people? I feel like I'm been taking my crazy pills again!

I also notice that Wonder Woman's apparently been feminist-ized in this sequel. No longer does she wear the star-spangled bikini she's been sporting for nearly eighty years (!). Laws, no! That look was imposed on her by the evil Patriarchy. Mustn't allow nasty old white men to tell a strong, independent character like Wonder Woman how to dress! 

Instead she's now completely covered from the neck down by chain mail and armor (that still emphasizes her breast, by the way). Heck, why stop there? Why give icky old males anything to leer at? Stick a helmet on her head, and cover up her flattering features while you're at it!

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