Tales From The Grocery: Google

A few years ago I got a second job as a cashier at a grocery store in order to pay off some bills. It was a miserable, humiliating and demoralizing experience in every measurable sense, and I got the hell out of there as soon as my bills were paid. I feel genuinely sorry for anyone who has to work in such a place.

Here is a terrifying Tale From The Grocery. Please note that all Tales are 100% true.

One night a guy came into the store and very deliberately walked all the way across the front end to my register. He stopped and asked me if I knew the address of the local mission shelter. When I said I was sorry that I didn’t know, he said, “OK. I just thought I’d ask someone before I tried to Google it.” Then he spun on his heel and walked back out.

People are flippin' weird.

This Week In Irony

If you head over to Google you'll see this is their Doodle for today: a graphic celebrating the 123rd anniversary of Yosemite National Park.

Thinking about heading out there to visit the park on its birthday? Not so fast, Bub! Due to the government shutdown all 401 National Parks* are closed until further notice. Nice timing there, Google (cue Sad Trombone)!

Also affected by the shutdown: NASA's Near Earth Object Office. You know, the people who monitor asteroids and other near-earth objects that may pose a threat to the planet. Come on, extinction-level meteor! Now's your chance to finally bash into Earth and wipe out our whole sorry civilization!

*The actual number of parks varies wildly depending on who you ask. Wouldn't think that would be such a mystery, but there you go.

Oh Google Ads, You've Done It Again!

I read this story today about layoffs at Disney Studios. Sad news indeed for employees of the House of Mouse.

Then I happened to notice this Google Ad at the bottom of the article. You know, the article about the company who's slashing jobs to appease their shareholding overlords:

Wow! Honest-To-Goodness Disney Jobs that pay $10 to $55 an hour! And there's 386 of them. In my area! Hey, that's where I live! And they're hiring Now! Woohoo! Clear my schedule, Alice! Disney, here I come!

3D, Or Not 3D

The current 3D virus that's infected movies and television has now spread to the internet. Today I went to Google Maps to get directions, and I accidentally clicked on Street View. While there, I noticed something new: in the upper left corner was an icon of a cartoon guy wearing 3D glasses. "No, it can't be," I thought. "They wouldn't. They couldn't!" I clicked on the little icon, and sure enough, Street View switched from 2D to anaglyph 3D. You know, the kind that requires the glasses with the red and blue lenses.

Holee. Crap. Google Street View is now in 3D. That's my house there, in glorious three dimensions. We truly live in a wondrous, if mystifying age.

I have no idea when this feature was added, but I'm assuming it was very recently. I hunted up a pair of 3D glasses and was surprised to see that it doesn't look that bad. I think it's totally unnecessary, but that's never stopped Google before.

How they're doing this, I have no idea. 3D requires two separate images from slightly different angles. Have the Street View cameras been taking two pictures of everything from day one? Or are they doing this with some kind of 3D conversion software?

Next month I'm fully expecting them to add Google Sound and Google Smell to Street View as well.

UPDATE: Hmm. As of this morning (April 8, 2010), the 3D option is gone. I'm not seeing the little yellow guy with glasses anymore. Maybe it was just a test that I stumbled onto?

It really was an option for a week or so! I have witnesses!

UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Thanks to Gretchen for pointing out that the 3D view is still there. If you right click on the image a popup menu appears, listing 3D as an option.