Thursday, May 30, 2013

THIS Is Why Al-Qaeda Hates America: Burger King Hands-Free Whopper

You know how when you watch the news and see a story about al-Qaeda and they're always out in the streets chanting, "Death to America?" Did you ever wonder, "Gosh, what's their problem? Why do they hate us so much?"

It's because of things like this.

Introducing the Burger King Hands-Free Whopper Holder. For those times when you're starving for a juicy flame-broiled burger but just don't have the strength to raise your hands and exert the minute pressure it takes to hold onto a burger.

As near as I can tell the Hands Free Whopper Holder is a real thing, but is only available in Puerto Rico right now as a fun little bonus for the top members of their Loyalty Card Program. But you just know it'll be hitting the States soon, shortly after virtually immobile Burger King customers here see it and start mooing and bleating for one of their own.

Is it too late to sign up for that Mars mission?

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